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Lisin

The Only Way Is Essex

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Ugh, once again too much Arg.  & Lydia can do so much better than him.  I see Gemma's back & doing her usual shit-stirring.

 

I love that Harry is back!  I've missed him a bit.  But he can stay gone if he's going to give Gemma more airtime.

 

& I like the idea of Eliot & Chloe dating.  They fit, even if it is just a showmance.  So much awkwardness between Lauren P. & Chloe.

 

Ferne?  Still don't care about her, or her relationship with Charlie.  Boring with a capital "B".

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I usually think Gemma is stirring the pot, but just this once I think she spilled on Harry to be able to stay out of it. I'm totally basing it on Harry being hyped on "Keeping her out of their relationship" before she even got there or said anything considering she hadn't spoken to Bobby in two moths. 

 

Also am I the only one having trouble telling Grace and Fran apart at times? 

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Wow, that new girl Imogen (I think they introduced her towards the end of last season) is quite flat.  Or at least that's the impression given by the pink bikini she wore on the yacht.

 

OMG, Chloe & Eliot's cheesy run up the beach & kiss scene was so lame.  But it made me laugh at least.

 

Ferne cheated on Charlie.  Harry cheated on Bobby.  Who's next?

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Diags is reduced to an extra.  I guess his pairing with Fran wasn't that popular.

 

I think we'll see them more as the season goes on.  I think the lack of airtime (right now) is because there is no drama with them.  They are fine, relationship-wise, which means they don't get as much airtime as, say, Ferne & Charlie.

 

Speaking of Ferne & Charlie...Team Chloe all the way.  I don't even believe that the cheating is real (I think it's all for airtime on the show); but if you're gonna tell a lie, make me believe it.  & if you tell a lie about cheating, don't expect me to root you on (even if I know the cheating isn't real).

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I guess Lauren Pope & Chloe don't need to make up now, Lauren has new buddies to play with & so does Chloe.  I did like the teasing between Chloe & Elliot about who gets what side of the bed.

 

Run, Lydia....RUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!  Yes, Arg can be amusing.  So can a 12 year-old.  But you don't want a relationship with a 12 year-old or someone with the mentality of that age.

 

Ugh.  I really don't like Bobby living with Gemma.  So contrived.  Plus, busybody Gemma needs a hobby besides giving her two cents about everyone else's relationships just because she can't get her own.

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Oy, Charlie.  I like that he stood up for himself.  But Ferne ill never stop making it all about her...& I'm sure she'll be cheating again soon.  After all, Charlie has shown that he'll take her back repeatedly.

 

Am I supposed to care about Jess & her crocodile tears?  Because I don't.  Obviously someone was desperate for a storyline this time around.

 

Lydia can do so much better than Arg, both as a boyfriend & a storyline.  & I didn't need to see the pig they ditched.

 

Gemma is a shit-stirrer, point blank period. 

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Gemma is overdue for a nervous breakdown.  When she said that "I'm 36 and fabulous" or whatever it was, to Harry's mum, she didn't even seem to believe it herself.

 

Gemma's starting to realize that she's not the bees' knees, & everyone agrees.  She's realizing no one wants her & she's not getting any younger (or better looking), so she's pretty much screwed in image-obsessed Essex.

 

& IA about Carol--get the fuck off my screen, you boring twit.  & take your annoying daughter, Jess, with you.  Oh for the days of Mark Wright & Lauren G.  We never knew how good we had it.

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Another meh episode.  I wonder if Dan plans to tell Lockie that he's been laying the groundwork to bang Danni.  Probably not. 

 

More Wrights.  Just what this show didn't need.  & Jess' pouty face about not getting married (or moving in with Ricky) does not make me sympathetic to her in the least.  I detest whiners.

 

Once again, Gemma manages to make someone else's problems all about her.  RME  Meanwhile, Ferne still thinks playing the victim looks good on her.  I loved Charlie telling her he couldn't enjoy the picnic because one little picnic doesn't relieve the stress (especially when Ferne still couldn't STFU about Chloe).

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So Bobby & Harry's fake relationship is kaput.  Oh well.  At least it gave Bobby a chance to yell at Gemma.  & Gemma had no comeback to speak of (that I saw).

 

Ugh to Danni & Lockie.  Especially his changing the agreement when he's the one who fucked up by cheating (repeatedly, IIRC).

 

I do not give two shits about Lauren Pope & whatshisname's fashion lines.  Not impressed in the least.  Nor do I care about the dumb ring Ricky gave Jess to shut her up about her fake-ass problems.

 

Once again...RUN, Lydia!  I think she's worried about having zero airtime or story without Arg.  She shouldn't worry, instead she should go make something happen with Dan.

 

Speaking of people worried about airtime, could the Georgia, Fran, & Grace drama be any more contrived?  I'm sure it can, but they are pushing the envelope already.   No one cares, ladies.

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I thought he was really saying, see Jess, this is how much I Love you.

 

This made me laugh so hard.

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Damn, I just realized that this whole time I've been thinking Lewis was Dan.  Good thing, because I don't see Lauren P. as Dan's type.  Oh & I so don't care that her little friend was slagged off by Danni unknowingly talking to one of his friends.

 

Ugh.  So Lydia was only allowed back if she acted like Arg is someone that anyone would want to fuck?  That sucks.  At least she'll be at Leah's wedding, even if it's with him.  Arg really thinks he's somehow a catch because he's lost 15 pounds over the last 6 years.  I guess Lydia's just supposed to forget his cheating with multiple partners.  Lydia's hair looks great at any rate.  & IA about the Ricky/Lydia conversation.

 

& I also agree on Fran, IDK WTF is going on with her, but she looks awful.  I wouldn't be surprised if Fran cheated on Diags in the early days, but I also think it's all for show anyway, so any cheating is kind of moot.

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I think they haven't shown Dan with his kid because either he or the baby mama doesn't want the kid shown.  I believe you have to have both parents permission to air the child on TV.  Ah, the stuff I learned when I used to watch some of the Real Housewives shows.  LOL

 

Yeah, I didn't even mention Billie having her kid because that's how little I care about her or her sister, Sam.  Although Billie seems like a nicer, more gentle version of Sam.

 

 

Arg continues to act childlike, which is making him seem a little slow or special to me.

 

I think Arg thinks it's an attractive quality, ya know, the Peter Pan Syndrome.  What Arg doesn't realize is that a) most of the guys who can pull that off are at least somewhat attractive and/or rich, & b) even they have to grow up sometime because the older they get, the less attractive PPS looks on them.

 

Oh & I watched the Ladies of London episode, but Lucy barely spoke.  She was just there to model Caprice's clothes & I think she spoke a sentence or two at most.  Her body looked amazing, though.

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Lydia didn't run.  Gross.  Even more gross was Arg giddily telling all of Essex about it.

 

& y'all can try, but I don't care about the Fran/Grace/Georgia/Jasmin stuff.

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Worst season of TOWIE ever

 

ICAM.  What are the producers thinking?  I don't care about 99% of these people.  Hell, I'd take Mario & Lucy with their merry-go-round relationship back at this point.  Just awful.  & the fact that Arg still has any screen time just makes it worse.

 

Gemma's tears over the Lydia/Arg bang didn't move me at all.  In fact, I laughed at how long she had to hold her hand up to her face before she finally forced a couple tears out.  Not so easy after all the Botox is it, Gem?

 

Speaking of Botox, nice to see Eliot's face move more this episode.  & I'm 90% sure his relationship with Chloe is fake fake fake, but the two of them are selling it like champs.  Only part of the show worth paying attention to at this point.

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I don't know what Eliot does for work, but I think Chloe's baby daddy won't let her have her daughter onscreen.  Or it was a mutual decision.  We saw her daughter once (maybe twice) in a previous season, but it was one scene lasting only a minute or two.  I'd like to see them interacting with each other's kids, but if all the parents made the decision to keep the kids off-screen, I'll respect them more.

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I wonder if they live in Spain with their mom & if his sister is marrying someone who works/lives in Spain.  I'd laugh a little if the "other country" was, like, Ireland...or Wales.

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There are way more women than men on the show.  & so they all battle with petty dramas to get air time.

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Probably because Lauren P. was just co-signing & Danni doesn't think it's worth her effort.  Or they both need an actual storyline & this is the best they could do.

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Anything involving the Wrights is usually instigated by Carol...or Jess.  & I hate Jess' hair, I think it looks awful.  But I'm not surprised that Arg got the party/argument started.  When he isn't telling everyone's business, he likes to shit-stir in other ways.  Other than that, the whole thing was boring.

 

I didn't mind New Georgia, simply because it's nice to see someone tell Lydia that Arg isn't worth her time.  & since her own mother won't do it, her sister will do nicely.

 

Danni & Lauren's P.'s "fight" or disagreement or whatever was lame lame lame.

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You missed nothing, she did not apologize.  Carol stood there, looking at Leah like Leah was supposed to apologize for being upset her wedding was ruined.  & as much as I hate Arg, putting ALL the blame on him & none on Carol and/or Jess?  Seems like a load of BS to me.

 

& ugh to Lydia taking Arg back.  He would need a whole new personality, laugh, face, & body just for me to stay in the same room with him while I told him there was no chance in hell.

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I haven't watched the special yet (IDK if I will), but the first Ibiza episode was pretty good. I actually missed Mario! But I think that's because the Lucy drama (and Lucy herself) won't be there. Funny to see Elliott pretend (poorly) that Mario doesn't bother him. Elliott is a total control freak, so I'm sure he'll lose his cool soon.

What the fuck was up with Lydia's lipstick at Jess' birthday? Almost as awful a choice as being with Arg. Girl needs an intervention.

Lauren P. can miss me with those crocodile tears, so fake! Just like her relationship with Lewis.

I feel bad for Danni & Lockie, but mostly Danni. I wonder why they agreed to make her miscarriage a part of the show.

Can't wait to catch up on the rest!

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That was a lame break up for a fake relationship. I'm slightly disappointed. Everything else was boring too. But of course Ferne wants ALL the details…she wants to gloat.

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Arg's laugh makes me want to stab myself in the eye. At least Lydia wised up for now.

It looks like Chloe & Elliot are done because he let a drunk chick sleep in h ok s bed. I wish I cared, but I don't.

And I will never care about anything Gemma does…ever.

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Aww, Jess' crocodile tearing about her relationship (which was as fake as her teeth, nails and eyelashes)…give me a break. Don't care, never cared. I do kinda love Ricky being a dick about it, even if it is his natural state.

Yay! Chloe and Elliott seem done. They became boring quickly.

Everything else was just rehashing shit we already knew…like a video recap done by various Essex people. Oh except Lewis saying Fran's bitter she ended up with Diags instead of Tom. That shit was pretty funny.

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Did my eyes deceive me or was there no Arg yet again? Everything is better without him.

OMFG, I do not give a rat's ass about Gemma OR Ferne, so why would I give a fuck about their lame fight. Billie nailed it when she said it would last for weeks. Of course it will, what else will give them air time? Though Ferne could have something if she gives Gemma's words credence by stalking Chloe. Now there's a story line!

Danni looked lovely in her blue lingerie.

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Bobby's charity event was awesome. And to do it because of his mom? Aww…

I'm surprised Ferne and Gemma made up so quickly, maybe they'll start up again next series.

Why is Elliot all over Chloe? Did he find out that Mario has been sniffing around (as he does with many of the newly single ladies apparently).

Bye, Ricky! Won't miss you! Though I do prefer you to Jess (who annoys the ever-loving shit outta me).

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Gemma needs to STFU. It's always okay for her to be the shit-stirrer and/or talk shit about people, but never okay for someone else. Just reminds me why I can't stand Gemma. I don't like Ferne either, they both suck.

I'm also Team Mario when it comes to Jess. No one cares, gurl. And wanting Ricky to basically never get over you? You are so not worth that. Though Ricky needs to not ever sing again.

No Arg was magnificent. And I LOVED that no one mentioned him or seemed to miss him and his loud annoying laugh at all.

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Once again, Ferne's only purpose seems to be to run her mouth then pretend to be sad about it.

And IDGAF, I'm Team Chloe vs Elliott/Everyone. He bugs me.

Lydia obviously needs a storyline with Arg in rehab.

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Is Lydia capable of having a conversation without crying? She really bugs me. 

I loved the way DIags stuck up for Chloe. I think if I ever met Elliot, I would need a shower afterwards, just to get the schmarmyness off of me.

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Ugh. Arg is unnecessary to life. And I hated how he tried to act like he was ending things with Lydia…for the sake of his sobriety. STFU, waste of space. Lydia dumped your ass TWO years ago. IDK what dream world he's living in or what drugs he's still on, but I want some.

Charlie's mad Chloe said Joey would be a better brother after he said basically the same thing? And after a ton of drama between her and his cheating big-mouthed girlfriend? Have all the seats, Chuck. Why is this season "everyone hate on Chloe"? So lame and still Team Chloe.

Oh and fuck you too, Jess. My God, you are annoying and one of the most delusional members of your family…and that's saying something.

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The new.people look intriguing…and about 20 times hotter than most of the cast. New Chloe is lovely, I know she's friends with Jess but I won't be surprised to see them fall out because she's prettier than Jess. And Jess never likes anyone who takes too much attention from her. And new.guy (forgot his name) looked quite attractive, I hope he looks as good in the light of day.

Debbie really expected Lydia to be okay with Debbie taking Arg's side all the damn time and coddling him as if he were her own child. Debbie's thirstiness for air time has busted her brain. Lydia may annoy me right now but she's 100% right about the wrongness of Debbie being closer to Arg than her own daughter.

Poor Chloe! I can't believe Charlie didn't show up. He irritates me the more he's on the show. Maybe because he's dating one of the most annoying people on the show. It might be rubbing off on him.

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So new guy is still hot, though he lost some points for lying about the kiss with Lauren Pope (especially to her face!).

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Since when are OG!Chloe and Jess on good enough terms that Chloe would not only care but also tease Jess about her new romance? Ugh, whatever.

So Charlie and Ferne are going to rehash one of their two storylines…they broke up, again. Also, Chloe giving a fuck about this and showing sympathy to Ferne? I call shenanigans.

And stupid Arg and his stupid face and laugh were so unnecessary during New Guy's apology to Lauren P. Let me rephrase: stupid Arg and his stupid face and laugh are always unnecessary.

And wow that argument at the end was so lame and scripted.

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Geez Louise, I cannot wait for this season to be over. Stop trying to make the new couple (or couple of exes) happen! They are beyond boring. I'd rather see Arg and Gemma make out for a half hour and you know how I feel about them! Speaking of Arg, glad to see he can mooch off his own mom rather than trying to get Debbie to throw him the unending pity party.

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Arg somehow has a much higher opinion of himself than is warranted. IDK how he became so delusional, but I'd bet part of it is snagging a girl so far out of his league (Lydia), and his mommies (his mom and Lydia's) giving him a false sense of himself by lying their asses off.

The new people are such fails. Thank goodness there are only two episodes left and then we'll get a break from them.

Still Team Chloe, though now I want to see her and Mario make a go of things.

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Ugh, Lydia. If you keep doing stupid flirtatious shit with Arg, despite supposedly having a boyfriend, I'm going to think you deserve that useless, worthless prick. This is why Arg thinks he's people.

Don't care if new guy fucked Lauren P., I just want him and his Jessalike (or Chloe II) to go the fuck away. And they can take Jess with them.

Damn, Frankie! I see.someone has kept up with her botoxing. Maybe miss an appointment or two so we can recognize your face, girl.

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And Lydia dumps her boyfriend because she's worried about storylines.for the next season. Pathetic. She deserves Arg and his cheating and his stupid laugh.

Whenever Jess has a fake break up scene, she always looks like she's surprised the man didn't light himself on fire in grief over not getting to bang her (or continue banging her, as the case may be).

Gemma, you aren't having a baby. Not unless you meet a deaf man because your voice can make every sperm in the vicinity swim away as fast as they can. Plus, you ain't cute. Yeah, ugly people have kids too, but your personality is equally ugly, if not more so.

No one cares about you, Ferne; deal with it.

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Okay, Lydia officially deserves Arg and all the BS that comes with him. If she bitches about him at all next season, I will have zero sympathy for her. And, frankly, I'm over the attitude she's had and the shit-stirring she's done this season.

Oh OG Chloe, just walk away from Elliot. I have to hope his "controlling" ways are all an a t for the show if they plan to be together.

STFU, Jess. He barely wanted your ass, apparently you aren't as impressive as you think you are. That being said, I still don't give two squirts of piss about any of the new people.

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I'm watching the first episode of Marbs now.... Ouch for Lockie + Danni breaking up.... But, he was being an ass....;-x

Edited by OrientalAmish

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Locke has tendency to be a dick and then think some random sort of romantic gesture should wipe the slate clean.

So Pete doesn't like to put in any work to get a girl? I can't wait for Jess to find out, she definitely expects to be treated as though she's a prize to be won.

I love OG Chloe, but I have no interest in the Chloe/Elliott merry-go-round.

Gemma getting butt hurt over Vas not wanting to deal with her loud ass and ridiculous antics made me laugh. Girl, bye. You ARE annoying, deal with it.

Still too much Arg for my liking.

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