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Alaskan Bush People

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Another awesome recap, R/O.  While "Rainiac" (properly attributed to Dr. Acula) is awesome, "Rhain with an H" is right up there, especially given the number of times you dutifully typed it out completely.

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I watched only part of the show but their fall protection gear was complete bullshit. I spent two years as a site manager (and safety monitor) on a construction managed by USA Corps of Engineers. A fall protection harness has crotch straps, what they want us to believe is effective is nonsense, without a crotch strap, the person falling would simply slip out of the harness and get injured or die. Not that any of these morons dieing is a bad thing, clean u-p the gene pool.

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4 hours ago, AZChristian said:

"Rhain with an H" is right up there,

Someone else did that and I remembered it... if I knew the person I would definitely give them the credit... I am thinking I saw it on FB somewhere... 

Made me laugh...

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Thank you once again, RO for another great review!  (and for suffering through each and every episode this season).  Ok, it was only 7 or so, but I still feel stupider every time I watch this shitshow.

So thanks for watching it so we don't have to.

I did hear that Matt had to go back to rehab again.  Rehab from what though?  I thought they were in the "the bush".  What could he be addicted to?  Now, if I were mean, I'd say it was either because he figured out how to make his own moonshine.  Or he just used those batteries to make his own little meth lab.  And basically got horribly addicted to his own product(s).  But since I am not a mean person, I would never say any of those things.  ;)

Seriously though, I do hope Matt does get the help he needs to get well once again.  Probably the best thing would be to get away from his grifter family -- the sooner, the better.

Since they showed such few episodes this season, I do wonder about the future of this show.  Since it is so obviously fake, I wonder if it's still getting decent ratings any longer.  Anyone know?

Thanks again for the review, RO!  Fantastic stuff once again.

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On 9/30/2018 at 1:37 PM, thebigboot said:

Eating the family? Wouldn’t that be animal cruelty for the bears?

Yeah...my apologies to the bears.

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Good Lord there was so much eye rolling in this latest 2 hour episode my eyes literally rolled out of my head and onto the hardwood floors several times.

 

Matt's air conditioned suit was awesome. I want to make myself one and walk around the neighborhood pulling that wagon with the generator and windows AC in it while I'm wearing my tarp with a hose duct taped from me to the AC. <eyeroll>

 

The Browns are just typical siblings that do crazy things with each other like myself and my siblings did all the time. Of course we were 6 years old at the time. <eyeroll>

 

Awwww...what a beautiful wedding. <sarcasm> I wonder if the family of Rain with an H have received the ransom note yet? <eyeroll>

 

In all seriousness that is a damn fine looking barn once it was finished. Which is proof beyond a reasonable doubt that these dipshits didn't build it. The prosecution rests. <eyeroll>

 

I'm really not sure if Matt is really in rehab for drinking/drugs. I think that was just for the "season" cliff hanger. After all this is a family that faked stage 4 cancer just a few months ago. <eyeroll><eyeroll>

 

The drawing of the fire truck...I thought the exact same thing when I saw it. A 6 year old kid drew it and far better that Noah-nothing could have. And if by chance you are in the middle of a raging forest fire and that is your defense??? Well you are going to die. Come on FIRE! <eyeroll>

 

Those are just the top ones but there were plenty of others. I really hope they took the animals back to the farm store where they came from because I can see this bunch of buffoons sitting around a fire with a chick-on-a- stick being cooked feathers and all.

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17 hours ago, b4pjoe said:

Good Lord there was so much eye rolling in this latest 2 hour episode my eyes literally rolled out of my head and onto the hardwood floors several times.

 

Matt's air conditioned suit was awesome. I want to make myself one and walk around the neighborhood pulling that wagon with the generator and windows AC in it while I'm wearing my tarp with a hose duct taped from me to the AC. <eyeroll>

 

The Browns are just typical siblings that do crazy things with each other like myself and my siblings did all the time. Of course we were 6 years old at the time. <eyeroll>

 

Awwww...what a beautiful wedding. <sarcasm> I wonder if the family of Rain with an H have received the ransom note yet? <eyeroll>

 

In all seriousness that is a damn fine looking barn once it was finished. Which is proof beyond a reasonable doubt that these dipshits didn't build it. The prosecution rests. <eyeroll>

 

I'm really not sure if Matt is really in rehab for drinking/drugs. I think that was just for the "season" cliff hanger. After all this is a family that faked stage 4 cancer just a few months ago. <eyeroll><eyeroll>

 

The drawing of the fire truck...I thought the exact same thing when I saw it. A 6 year old kid drew it and far better that Noah-nothing could have. And if by chance you are in the middle of a raging forest fire and that is your defense??? Well you are going to die. Come on FIRE! <eyeroll>

 

Those are just the top ones but there were plenty of others. I really hope they took the animals back to the farm store where they came from because I can see this bunch of buffoons sitting around a fire with a chick-on-a- stick being cooked feathers and all.

I think Matt does have a substance abuse problem, just based on the behavior we've seen on the show. I also think Ami's stage three (I don't believe four was ever mentioned as fact) is also real. It's also not completely gone, as they are monitoring it regularly and Billy mentioned that it hadn't changed and that it was too small to even bother with a biopsy at this point. What they've shown us so far looks all too familiar to me, which is why I am willing to give them the benefit of the doubt.

I totally agree that no way did they build that barn, but they sure gave the subterfuge the old college try. The animals were cute.

Because I'm a sappy girl, I always get a little verklempt viewing a wedding. I'm not gonna lie, Noah's professions of adoration for Rhain with an H were adorable. They say there's a lid for every pot, and I do think it's sweet that they found each other. *sniff*

Edited by Gothish520
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26 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

Some websites say it was Stage 3; others say Stage 4.  Many of us are of the opinion that she never had cancer at all.

I understand why some people might feel that way, but like I said, what we've seen so far seems very familiar to me. There's no doubt that Ami looked thinner and sickly for a while, and she does look healthier now. Also, the way some of the family was acting when it was going on, well, either it really was happening or they are darn good actors.

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On ‎10‎/‎3‎/‎2018 at 7:13 PM, little hermit said:

What is that on Noah's face in the picture of Realityobservers recap link?????

I think he wants to become a Borg and that's his Seven-of-Nine homage.  Or at least that's what I thought when I saw it.

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9 hours ago, Fosca said:

I think he wants to become a Borg . . . 

The whole mess of them are already "The Collective" . . . 

ETA:  Just watching the "finish the barn" scenes.  If you're fearing a forest fire may overrun your property, why would you rush to finish a barn so you could move animals into the potential path of the fire?

Edited by AZChristian
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Watched the last episode out of sheer curiosity; which was probably stupid but hey I had nothing better to do.  Was going to remove them completely but had still been reading the boards and had to see at least one last time what they could possibly be up to.  Not having seen the whole season:

Changes!  Gabe with a eyebrow piercing, Bird looking a little heavier (not in the brain though), Matt looking a lot grayer, Bam actually looks pretty good the family separation must agree with him. 

Matt has a chicken best friend and invents a space suit to cool himself despite the fact that he'll sweat out 20 lbs trying to get it on. Some things truly never change.

Bird is smart enough to know she shouldn't be at the top of the barn when the lightening is hitting directly overhead; but not smart enough to take her hand off the metal ladder.

Power tool ban? I have no doubt at all if these yahoos were real and not being filmed they'd use any and all power tools they felt like using no matter what fire precautions were in effect.  But since they're fake and the barn build is fake Disco is in charge so no worries about them starting their own fires.  And of course it plays right into the "drama" story.  Notice despite the urgency Bam seemed to disappear for the second half of the barn raising, didn't see him when the tin roof was going on, not available for the shooting schedule?  

Find a fire lookout and never see them visit it again - I assume they're waiting to use it only after Noah invents a bush telescope and Matt installs a lawn chair with self cooling fan cushion and a beer storage seat.

Dead brush removal - to where? So they walked out into the forest and "cleared" dead brush but all we saw was movement from one spot to another spot 10 feet away. Did they actually haul it out, hose it down, burn it safely or otherwise truly get rid of it? No idea; not shown.

Rose petal water, Bird takes a long satisfying drink and says it tastes like sugar, Rain's face says "Did you slip some of Matt's stash into your bottle?"

Bear gets an extreme speech; again somethings never change. Had to suspend the drinking game for his barn monologue though, didn't want actual alcohol poisoning since he used the word approximately 1000 times in five minutes. 

Noah said McGyver things talking about the fire truck?  And Gabe said they're putting "the mints on the pillows"?  What happened to the we don't know pop culture and we're isolated shtick?  Guess they'd claim they caught up on all that while stuck in California (for the believer fans) or, for us let's say more likely they know these sayings because they leave the local hotel each morning then watch Netflix in their trailers while the crew nails boards onto the barn before they have to go finish the last two nails in each board for the cameras.

Now they have livestock in a "deal" - gloss over what the deal was for, money or trade for barn wood, money or trade for livestock, money or trade for a wedding, even how they got the hardware for the barn door rollers - never a mention of what the deal is or what they traded or, more important, where did the money come from

Matt goes into the wilderness carrying..........the worlds largest rolling pin?   (yes before you quote to correct me I know what it was)

The finished fire truck - I can't even there's too much to single out except maybe.......why does it need the lights?  Oh, yeah, because it's Noah and he can.

Rhain Alicia understands how Noah's brain works?  Nope, not touching that one with a 100 foot pole.  

Will they have another season? Will Bam's relationship be admitted to on air? Will Ami get her grandbabies (gulp!)?  Does anyone still watch this because they think it's real?  

Edited by sigmaforce86
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On 10/8/2018 at 12:43 PM, sigmaforce86 said:

Matt goes into the wilderness carrying..........the worlds largest rolling pin?   (yes before you quote to correct me I know what it was)

At first I thought he was carrying a car muffler around....

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Damn some of them have put on weight between seasons, the one girl with the bad tooth got very pudgy and so did Gabe ( I think that’s his name)

Matt is the only guy that when he’s cleaned up, is decent looking ( just tooooo short). It’s a shame he has such a bad problem with booze. He needs to get away from the whole wacky family . 

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On 10/4/2018 at 7:21 PM, AZChristian said:

Some websites say it was Stage 3; others say Stage 4.  Many of us are of the opinion that she never had cancer at all.

There were a lot of rumors about it being stage 4.  But I believe if you go strictly by the television show, it only ever said stage 3. 

I'm a little late to the party for this season, I had all the episodes recorded but haven't gotten around to watching them until now, and I've only watched like the first four.

And I'll have to catch up on  realityobserver's recaps, of course.  

I see everyone is still enjoying hate watching this show.  But so far it's been nice that the whole family is back together, and that Gabe is out of his catatonic state.

It's good for the show, as is the lack of old footage (I'm avoiding the rerun shows).

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On 11/2/2018 at 10:34 AM, iwasish said:

Damn some of them have put on weight between seasons, the one girl with the bad tooth got very pudgy and so did Gabe ( I think that’s his name)

Matt is the only guy that when he’s cleaned up, is decent looking ( just tooooo short). It’s a shame he has such a bad problem with booze. He needs to get away from the whole wacky family . 

I beg to differ: while I agree Matt is fairly attractive, I also find Bam to be pretty good-looking too. His hair is a bit too long for my taste, but still an attractive man. 

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On 11/4/2018 at 6:30 PM, Gothish520 said:

I beg to differ: while I agree Matt is fairly attractive, I also find Bam to be pretty good-looking too. His hair is a bit too long for my taste, but still an attractive man. 

Funny Matt and Bam would be considered the most attractive since they are the oldest.  But Bear and Gabe seem more childlike.  Maybe the Brown boys are late bloomers.  

I've been continuing my binge watching of season 8, I just have to watch the season finale yet.  I also watched the behind the scenes episode about the crew, so I thought I would make some comments:

Regarding the behind the scenes special, the crew seemed to be very complimentary of the Browns, and there was a lot of focus on the Browns helping the crew out if they got injured, got a truck stuck in the mud, needed help traversing the floods, were seasick on the boat, or if there were bears about.  I don't believe this was all just the typical BS you see with this show, so maybe the Browns have a good streak in them after all.  I've always said I never minded the kids so much, it's the way Billy manipulates them.

Bear had a lot of scenes last season, and people were getting very sick of him.  Looks like they've cut way back on his scenes this season, I wonder if they were aware of all the comments.

I've come to the conclusion that I have a problem with narcissists, they irritate me.  Bear's antics don't bother near as much as Noah's inflated view of himself.  I think the funniest line of the season was his comment "Tesla would be proud" when talking about one of his inventions.  By the way, I don't think they ever actually showed that bug zapper hat actually zapping any bugs, did they?  It just looked like a hat with a few black light tubes in it.

Funny how Bird is one of the youngest but gets the leadership role so much.  I guess the boys listen to her since she's the lone female (aside from the even younger Rain).  I still wonder why there has never been even the smallest mention of her finding a man, or thinking of getting married or having children in the future.  I'm sure Rain will go off to find someone like Noah and Bam did when she reaches the right age.

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7 hours ago, rmontro said:

I don't believe this was all just the typical BS you see with this show, so maybe the Browns have a good streak in them after all.

I wouldn’t doubt that they have some decent qualities. My main problem with them is the manipulation. And as someone that has direct experience with late stage lung cancer, I’m not buying that Ami cancer scare for a second. Lung cancer is simply not something that is so neatly and conveniently taken care of, and in so timely of a fashion. For anyone doubting this, try looking up the statistics on lung cancer (I’ll save you the trouble though, by stating that they’re very poor is an understatement).

Rain won’t have any problems scoring a top notch mate. Truth be told, Birdy really isn’t bad looking either. But we live in a vain society, and that missing tooth is gonna hurt her SMV pretty bad in the dating market :D (I jest, but in all seriousness, I meant what I said about her looks being decent).

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2 hours ago, wanton87 said:

I wouldn’t doubt that they have some decent qualities. My main problem with them is the manipulation. And as someone that has direct experience with late stage lung cancer, I’m not buying that Ami cancer scare for a second. Lung cancer is simply not something that is so neatly and conveniently taken care of, and in so timely of a fashion. For anyone doubting this, try looking up the statistics on lung cancer (I’ll save you the trouble though, by stating that they’re very poor is an understatement).

I don't know about any statistics, but I have to disagree with you about Ami's lung cancer. My mom passed in 2016 after a four-year battle, and after her initial treatment, she did bounce back and was almost back to her old self for a decent amount of time, until the cancer reared its ugly head again, this time traveling to her brain. After that it was two more operations, two rounds of radiation, and the last year of her life was pretty terrible.

Ami seems to be at the point that my mother was after her first operation and chemo. They've clearly stated on the show that she gets checked every few months, and that it is not gone but it is small, not even large enough to biopsy. As far as I know, no one from the Brown family has claimed that she is cured.

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4 hours ago, wanton87 said:

I wouldn’t doubt that they have some decent qualities. My main problem with them is the manipulation.

I feel kind of bad saying this, but they seem like the type who would help you out if you were broken down on the road, but in the process they might also steal the twenty dollar bill sticking out of your visor.

 

4 hours ago, wanton87 said:

Rain won’t have any problems scoring a top notch mate. Truth be told, Birdy really isn’t bad looking either. But we live in a vain society, and that missing tooth is gonna hurt her SMV pretty bad in the dating market :D (I jest, but in all seriousness, I meant what I said about her looks being decent).

Yeah, it really is a shame Bird won't get those teeth fixed, because she really would be a pretty girl if she did.  I've always said she must have a bad fear of dentists.  As it is, it kind of drags her down from a 6 to a 3, to be coarse about it.  But I still find it strange that there has been absolutely no mention of either of the girls dating,  Bird especially, considering her age.  Maybe as part of her refusal to see a dentist, she's given up on the idea.  It's interesting to see the difference between the kids who seem happy to stay within the family group, and those who want to expand their horizons a bit.

  

2 hours ago, Gothish520 said:

Ami seems to be at the point that my mother was after her first operation and chemo. They've clearly stated on the show that she gets checked every few months, and that it is not gone but it is small, not even large enough to biopsy. As far as I know, no one from the Brown family has claimed that she is cured.

Agreed.  I'm suspicious that they may be exaggerating the problem, we have no way of knowing.  But despite the positive spin they've put on it (and I can't really blame them for that), Ami isn't out of the woods yet.

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3 hours ago, Gothish520 said:

I don't know about any statistics, but I have to disagree with you about Ami's lung cancer. My mom passed in 2016 after a four-year battle, and after her initial treatment, she did bounce back and was almost back to her old self for a decent amount of time, until the cancer reared its ugly head again, this time traveling to her brain.

It’s been a few years, and so I can’t say how much has changed in that time, but here is what I recall. 15% of lung cancer patients survive to the 5 year mark. So if we break that down into everyday numbers, 15 out of a 100 lung cancer patients will still be alive over that time frame. 50% of lung cancer patients are gone within the 1st year (My father lasted 8 months). I wasn’t trying to be dishonest in my claim, but was speaking in statistical probabilities. It sounds as if your mother was exceptional, and that you got to spend considerably more time with her than most families get, and that’s a good thing, minus any suffering that she had to endure of course.

In the case of Ami, is it possible that she responded well to the treatments? Sure it is, but again, statistically, the odds would not have been in her favor. Do I believe it? Well, I suppose I’m a pessimist, especially when it comes to the Brown’s, but no, I do not believe it.

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Finished with the final episode.  Matt's substance abuse problems really do sadden me.  I don't know what happened exactly, but I'm sure it didn't go down the way we were shown, which was almost like some weird Alice in Wonderland metaphor for what was really going on with him.  Who goes out in the middle of a forest, wraps Saran Wrap around a few trees, and climbs in to hibernate?

Noah seems to have developed a new speech impediment.  In addition to his adding "uh" to the end of words, he's now started to insert pauses in the middle of words.  Like goo..ood, inter....est, ti....ime, and fra....ame.

I don't even want to discuss the stinky feet contest.  But it did occur to me that maybe Rain won because of her fear of heights, maybe she won with the smell of fear.

They didn't spend much time on No-uh's wedding.  Interesting that it was the youngest son to marry first.  I wonder what the status of Bam's relationship is?  I would have thought he would be married by now.  Maybe he is, who knows?

Noah claims he has a photographic memory, I don't recall this coming up before.  Maybe he does, but I'm skeptical.  More likely the idea of having a photographic memory appeals to him and his "genius" view of himself. 

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It could be that Bear's lack of scenes is because he injured his eye while apparently climbing an (EXTREME!) tree.  But I don't know if that happened before or after they filmed those scenes for this "season". 

I always thought Bam was the most normal of the bunch.  I think he is getting tired of doing this show though.  He really looked irritated much of the time.  But then again, if I were stuck around a lot of those numbskulls, I probably would be too. 

Hope Matt does get the help he needs.  But getting away from Billy and his cult would probably work wonders for his mental health.

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On 11/7/2018 at 11:07 PM, brgjoe said:

I always thought Bam was the most normal of the bunch.  I think he is getting tired of doing this show though.  He really looked irritated much of the time.  But then again, if I were stuck around a lot of those numbskulls, I probably would be too. 

I agree, he even did leave the show once, which set into motion a half hour narrative on that episode. Where did he go, and what did he do, is still up in the air. And then for reasons never explained, he came back to act all disgusted and fed up with the likes of Bam and his sisters. 

I can't blame him for being disappointed in his station in life, being a minor co-star in an unbelievably terrible reality show must be a really terrible letdown. 

I wonder if the producers promised things would be different if he came back on the show, and when he saw the final edit, he was just totally devastated in being led on to such a degree...

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On 11/9/2018 at 12:58 PM, realityobserver said:

I can't blame him for being disappointed in his station in life, being a minor co-star in an unbelievably terrible reality show must be a really terrible letdown. 

Here's the good news:  You're famous.

Here's the bad news:  You're on Alaskan Bush People.

It's like one of those genies where they grant you a wish, but there's a bad twist to it that you didn't foresee.

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On 11/23/2018 at 4:41 PM, rmontro said:

Here's the good news:  You're famous.

Here's the bad news:  You're on Alaskan Bush People.

It's like one of those genies where they grant you a wish, but there's a bad twist to it that you didn't foresee.

lol, the old Be careful what you wish for adage. :)

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On 11/23/2018 at 4:41 PM, rmontro said:

Here's the good news:  You're famous.

Here's the bad news:  You're on Alaskan Bush People.

It's like one of those genies where they grant you a wish, but there's a bad twist to it that you didn't foresee.

LOL! Good one.

But I don't know, it probably still beats working for a living.

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14 hours ago, Gothish520 said:

But I don't know, it probably still beats working for a living.

You'd think so, although from what I've heard, only Billy gets paid any real money.  I think he gets an executive producer credit or something like that?

But there's no way you could pay me enough to get anywhere near that saw mill that Matt put together.

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On 1/5/2019 at 3:36 PM, checker said:

"Fired" by Billy?

Maybe escaped is a better word.

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