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Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage

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I like to muse that the girl is Dr. Creepy McEharmony's illegitimate great-granddaughter, since it's well known that he's very bibley-religious in real life, and the commercial was something she was forced to do under duress in order to be "forgiven" for her "impurity".

True story: I once joined eHarmony for a month (aliens abducted me and made me join) and their "29 dimensions of compatibility" matched me, a strict vegetarian and animal lover, with an "avid hunter". Fail!

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The new M&M ad for Geico: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6etOdPkNAXs

The gekko's accent has always grated on me but the glottal way it says chocolate in this ad drives me up the goddamn wall, sounds like he's got a big ole ball of boogers lodged in his nose and throat.

The Geico pig also gets a mention, the voice is annoying as fuck and the pigs attitude has gotten more and more smarmy and sneery, for me the worst of the ads with the pig is the one where the chick leaves her boyfriend for the pig because the pig hears from his insurance company first. Really? Who the fuck wants to be with someone that shallow, I don't give a fuck how great she might be at sucking dong and getting fucked in the pooper.

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Old eHarmony dude needs to go away as well.  He's like the crypt keeper.  The ad with speed dating?  I'd rather see Marilyn Manson sitting in front of me than that lecherous old coot.

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Sweet baby J, I had never seen the negotiating babysitter Chevy commercial before today and that girl makes me want to run out and get my tubes tied. Yes, how clever of you to run up the charges just because you see someone has a new car. Hope that extra 20 bucks was worth it, because you're not getting hired again!

Also the commercial where the Girl Scout talks shit to the office drone. (I think it's for coffee creamer?) I work in a soul-sucking job and you know what, some days just getting out of bed and going to work is a feat. Come talk to me in fifteen years when you've got bills to pay and you're listening to people give you crap all day long. Then we can talk about your  BS energy audit. Go sew a badge on your uniform, you smug child. Also, I feel really bad hating children this much.

Oh, and I forgot the Geico clutch cargo commercials where the paintings are talking to each other. Stupid and irritating. A double whammy!

Edited by BabyVegas
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Also, I feel really bad hating children this much.

I don't.

(I should mention I did proactively, voluntarily get my tubes tied at age 29. You're all welcome.)

Edited by bilgistic
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Also, I feel really bad hating children this much.

Don't.  That little blonde 'children of the corn' girl in the BMW commercial with her odd way of talking makes me want to... permanently glue a pacifier to her mouth.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KlvK-SRKdII

I cannot hit the remote fast enough.  She's right up there with the creepy Nelly Olsen like granddaughter on the eHarmony ad.  Ugh.

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I want the Sparkle Paper Towel Fairy to join forces with the Toaster Strudel kid so they can throw oranges at the brats in the Halos commercials.  Then I want them all to disappear in a Cadillac driven by the smug guy in that commercial. 

Edited by shlbycindyk
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I also want to add, just to make the above commercial people really miserable, I'd like to see the Geico pig in the backseat of the Cadillac singing Boots and pants!  Boots and pants! right up until they stop for a bbq lunch, if you know what I mean.

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The Bounty ad where the kids are blowing bubbles in their drinks and making a holy mess but mom s smiling because she's got Bounty. Ha! In what universe would that ever happen?

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The Bounty ad where the kids are blowing bubbles in their drinks and making a holy mess but mom s smiling because she's got Bounty. Ha! In what universe would that ever happen?

In the same alternate universe as the Visa paper towel mom.

This commercial used to make my mom get all stabby.  As if any of her children would have ever attempted it.  We'd have wound up on milk cartons.

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 One of my favorite threads at TWOP.   Below is a candidate for the Hall of Fame:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYn1vON2C8w

I started a thread specifically to bitch about kids in commercials, and this little brat, along with Strudel Boy, are my top candidates for Annoying Brats of the Year.

 

I don't.

(I should mention I did proactively, voluntarily get my tubes tied at age 29. You're all welcome.)

Same here, though I did have one child before getting it done.  One was definitely enough -- any more, and I'd have needed to be put on a Thorazine drip.

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I also want to add, just to make the above commercial people really miserable, I'd like to see the Geico pig in the backseat of the Cadillac singing Boots and pants!  Boots and pants! right up until they stop for a bbq lunch, if you know what I mean.

Ah... that would be great. Man I hated the Boots and Pants commercial. If he wants them so bad, he should go get a pair of them then. And add in the Ice Cream and Cake commercial as well. I think it was a Baskin Robbins one... and it was VERY annoying.

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I started a thread specifically to bitch about kids in commercials, and this little brat, along with Strudel Boy, are my top candidates for Annoying Brats of the Year.

We're trying to keep the threads more streamlined so we're covering kids, adults, wild boars etc all in this thread.  Makes it easier to keep the discussion flowing.

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We're trying to keep the threads more streamlined so we're covering kids, adults, wild boars etc all in this thread.  Makes it easier to keep the discussion flowing.

Ah....TWoP had a thread that was kid-specific, which I spent way more time in than I care to admit.  

Admins, please lock the Annoying Kids thread.

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It's fine. Annoying kids are annoying on another level. If no one posts there, no one posts there. If they do, they do.

Too bad we can't actually put the annoying kids in there and lock it...

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It's fine. Annoying kids are annoying on another level. If no one posts there, no one posts there. If they do, they do.

Thanks for replying so quickly about this -- I would hate to screw up on my first day here.

BTW, I love the way y'all have the forums set up.  Your presence was greatly missed when y'all left TWoP -- that place went downhill following the exodus of so many of the original recappers/admins.

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This commercial for Big Fish Casino (it's a video game) isn't just ridiculous, it's disgusting;

I thought it was A-Rod at first.  They play it all the time on my local cable news network.  Guessing they are trying to get the 40-55 year old woman online gamers --- but they are playing Farmville with their friends in sweats.  I don't see that demo being interested in Big Fish.

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The one that's got me yelling at the TV every time right now is the Old Navy pants commercial with Amy Pohler. 

Because only an idiot child wears skinny patterned jeans and a t-shirt to a JOB INTERVIEW. At a LAW FIRM. 

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The one that's got me yelling at the TV every time right now is the Old Navy pants commercial with Amy Pohler. 

Because only an idiot child wears skinny patterned jeans and a t-shirt to a JOB INTERVIEW. At a LAW FIRM. 

I think the leering is the worst.  The airport screener who almost sniffs the crotch of the woman while 'wanding' her --- so gross!  Like that would make me want to buy a pair?  Hey kids, buy our jeans and be groped in public!  Sign me up!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w0G3SgQdHOc

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Two ads - one, a cheap knockoff version of a MadMen's chick parked in a bathroom stall talking about the psychological trauma of "pooping in public," and the other (for bathroom tissue) with a blonde gal interviewing people about their bums - send me hurtling over furniture to get to the remote and hit a button - any button - to make them disappear.

Exactly what is the point of using British chicks to talk about bodily functions involving one's arse?  Do the ad-weasels think that the accent classes up the topic?  That their cheeky personalities make them and, by proxy, their products, endearing and appealing?

Not only do they make me stabby, they are killing my Anglophilia at a record pace.

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This new King's Hawaiian Rolls ad where the family sucks the rolls off the table and into their mouths.  This whole family can go away, hopefully choking to death on their rolls.

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There was a hair product commercial (on radio, too) with a Brit Chick talking about conditioning your haeh.  Or was it haaa?  It's such an odd sound, I can't replicate it in type.  At first, I didn't know what the hell she was talking about.  My Heaaah?  Y'know, we fought a pretty long war to be rid of those people.

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I also want to add, just to make the above commercial people really miserable, I'd like to see the Geico pig in the backseat of the Cadillac singing Boots and pants!  Boots and pants! right up until they stop for a bbq lunch, if you know what I mean.

I love Boots and Pants. Cracks me up every time. But anything to else Geico? Die.

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eHarmony is treating us with another creepy ad.  This one opens up with a couple groping each other at a party.

http://www.ispot.tv/ad/7g1K/eharmony-happy-tenth-aniversary

Then they walk in another room and start going at it.  In bursts the rest of the party guests and of course the creeptastic eHarmony old dude.  It's their 10th wedding anniversary so... it's OK to grope each other at a party?

Blech.

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I finally looked up "Boots and Pants" because I'd never seen it. I can't stand that pig, but I kind of like "boots and pants and boots and pants and boots and pants and..."

I foresee me singing it to my cats. I have no shame.

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Hey all, I was a lurker on TWoP for years. I had to post about the justfab.com ads that drive me nuts and I hadn't seen anyone talk about it yet! I always hated the way the women scream over the price of shoes, however, I just saw a new one with a twerkin' grandma. I couldn't look away! She did do a hell of a better job than Miley though!

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I saw one today that really gets on my nerves.  The two are bickering about who is going to pay at the restaurant and the insurance guy says let her pay she just got her good driving rebate check.  I deal with this at my job all the time.  Two people will be arguing and I can see the line of impatient people behind them getting annoyed and I know they are going to take it out on me.

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My pet peeve commercial right now: a married couple are in some tech store. The man has a baby straped to his stomach and he and his wife are bouncing to keep the baby asleep. The sales lady comes up to them and asks to help them. They both shush her really loud and point to the sleeping baby. First if it is that hard to keep the kid asleep shouldn't one parent wait in the car with the child. And second why is the mom bouncing if the dad is holding the child. Just a stupid, stupid commercial.

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I saw one today that really gets on my nerves.  The two are bickering about who is going to pay at the restaurant and the insurance guy says let her pay she just got her good driving rebate check.  I deal with this at my job all the time.  Two people will be arguing and I can see the line of impatient people behind them getting annoyed and I know they are going to take it out on me.

I completely loathe the one where the two airheaded women are in a boutique and are fawning over a handbag. One woman decides she can afford it because she's getting $150 back from her car insurance. Here's a crazy idea: How about not spending that money and putting it in savings, you stupid twit? You really don't need an expensive handbag. Ugh. But I'm not a TV-trope woman, so I guess I just don't understand.
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As much as I agree about the E Harmony franchise owning this thread, I also have to throw in the Christian Mingle and Match.com commercials -- they all look so fake, and set up even though many of the ads have the "actual first date" or whatever disclaimer at the bottom.  That just looks like such bull because I'll bet many of the first date encounters don't really go all that well.  These ads are just so off-putting and does NOT make me want to use their services!

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The thing about those sites like Christian Mingle, is no one would *ever* lie on one of those sites or anything.

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eHarmony is treating us with another creepy ad.  This one opens up with a couple groping each other at a party.

http://www.ispot.tv/ad/7g1K/eharmony-happy-tenth-aniversary

Then they walk in another room and start going at it.  In bursts the rest of the party guests and of course the creeptastic eHarmony old dude.  It's their 10th wedding anniversary so... it's OK to grope each other at a party?

Blech.

Umm, pretty much the whole point of going to parties when you're young is the hooking up AT THE PARTY aspect of it. Guess you've never been to a frat/college party.

Edited by TheGongOfDoom

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Umm, pretty much the whole point of going to parties when you're young is the hooking up AT THE PARTY aspect of it. Guess you've never been to a frat/college party.

Umm, I have.  The people in the commercial aren't young, they aren't hooking up, they are married to each other.  What I am snarking at is that the creepy old eHarmony dude tries to hold out his site as some virtuous place for relationships and he's standing in the room while they are hooking up.  That's never happened at any college frat party I've gone to.  The crypt keeper would kill any raging boner imo.

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I think the leering is the worst.  The airport screener who almost sniffs the crotch of the woman while 'wanding' her --- so gross!  Like that would make me want to buy a pair?  Hey kids, buy our jeans and be groped in public!  Sign me up!

 

Yes! This commercial is SO creepy! And I love the screen pause you've got in your post. It just captures the "yuck" of the thing.

My other major pet peeve commercial right now (it's been playing for a while) is the one for Optimum where the (doofus) husband has canceled the landline! Wife comes out to talk to him about it while he is (ineptly) working under their car. The worst part of the whole thing is the clunky dialogue that it only meant to set up the (idiot) husband's reply that "All [his] ideas are good ideas." Cue the oil dripping on (dopey) him. Ugh! I can't stand it!

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True story: I once joined eHarmony for a month (aliens abducted me and made me join) and their "29 dimensions of compatibility" matched me, a strict vegetarian and animal lover, with an "avid hunter". Fail!

So true! I joined for a short while a few years ago, and was matched with someone who is deathly allergic to cats, and I had three at the time.

I hope TWOP Howard doesn't come along and censor us for being off-topic! :)

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Hmm…let's see….besides Strudel Boy, Creepy E-Harmony Dude and Cawowine…there is Flo from Progressive Insurance who is becoming rather tiresome, the supposed "real people" who gush about "different positions, different speeds"  in the Trojan Vibrations commercials (not the actors whose hair blows back), the Yoplait Light teenaged girl being snotty with her mother about "swapping" her inarticulate boyfriend for a grungier model. The two guys from the Sonic commercials who sit in their car and bicker. I can't decide if they are a nerdy gay couple or a pair of socially awkward cousins hiding out from their nagging wives.

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The thing about those sites like Christian Mingle, is no one would *ever* lie on one of those sites or anything.

No WAY!! Seriously, a woman in her 60s who lives in my area was recently scammed out of either $500K or $300K (I've heard both figures) by a Nigerian con man on Christian Mingle.

The Christian Mingle commercials that bug me most are 1) The woman who sobs, "He's my second chance!" and 2) The one featuring the blended family, with the little blond girl who was obviously coached to say that the hole in her heart was filled by two very special people. What eight-year-old would come up with something like that?

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Tara, I'm pretty sure you're my new hero. I can't view the commercial, because Veet took it down, but I got a pretty good idea of the general assiness. I have so many, yet no words for how many donkey dicks they suck. I'm a 39-year-old woman who has been lasered, waxed and chemically hair-removed, and I still cannot be bothered to depilate the remaining hair (there's still a lot, because, hi, I'm human) 95% of the time. Fuck the patriarchy and the media run by it. Edited by bilgistic
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Veet has since apologized and withdrawn the ads due to 'misinterpretation of its tone' and 'in light of the feedback received'

Yeah, it's our fault for "misinterpreting" their tone. Asses. Just fucking apologize.

ETA: And it's even worse. Apparently, there was a fourth ad featuring a woman who has been in an accident and is lying on a stretcher in an ambulance. As an EMT cuts open her jeans, she pleads: 'Please, not the panties.' and turns into the bearded, hairy dude. The fuck? That's worse than all the others combined. Because a woman needs to be completely hairless before allowing emergency workers to save her life? Fuck that.

Edited by riley702
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Whoever's deciding this stuff seems to want women to be pre-pubescent, hairless little girls with big breasts.  It's sick.

Veet has since apologized and withdrawn the ads due to 'misinterpretation of its tone' and 'in light of the feedback received'

Yeah, it's our fault for "misinterpreting" their tone. Asses. Just fucking apologize.

ETA: And it's even worse. Apparently, there was a fourth ad featuring a woman who has been in an accident and is lying on a stretcher in an ambulance. As an EMT cuts open her jeans, she pleads: 'Please, not the panties.' and turns into the bearded, hairy dude. The fuck? That's worse than all the others combined. Because a woman needs to be completely hairless before allowing emergency workers to save her life? Fuck that.

I place at least half of the blame on porn, b/c have you seen that shit lately? Hairless fake-tanned lollipops with fake canteloupe breasts getting pounded sideways (literally) by fake-tanned, hairless muscle-bound I-don't-even-know-whats. And this is what people think is normal now. The rage I have... Edited by bilgistic
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