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Tara Ariano

S04.E15: Thad & Sara

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A man who sought refuge from his troubled marriage through an online relationship has doubts about his potential paramour due to her strange tales of seizures and kidnappings.

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So . . . is this the season of Catfish psychos? Ashley is seriously disturbed. I'm not surprised that she's still at it. She just seemed so flat. But then again, so did Thaddius. When he was relating his story to Nev and Max, he sounded so much like he was reading from a script -- badly. I'm just creeped out by the whole thing. Ick.

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Wow, my old hometown of OKC.  

 

This girl is not going to stop.  I had a feeling that she will just keep using the same girls photos or she will just pick someone else and start again, if she doesn't already have multiple fake accounts.

 

So how is this girl a stay-at-home mom, I mean she isn't married or anything...oh wait, she is in Oklahoma, I come from there, she can survive for life on welfare and everything else.  This girl was good, she brought them in with her reasons and tears.

 

What I can't figure out here is how does this show get these people to come on camera, like this girl for instance.  What does she have to gain from it?  Do they pay them to come on camera to tell their side of the story?  I mean I could totally see this girl saying she will come on camera for $500.

 

I also can't figure out the other side of the screen where these people start up these conversations with others halfway across the US or globe thinking that they might move for them or vice versa, it's just insane to me.  I mean i'm on gay sites/apps chatting w/ guys, but if they are outside of a 100 mile range, if that, I know it's not going to go anywhere at all, b/c I don't have time to drive around to meet someone even if we chat daily.

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I don't think I've ever actively disliked an episode of Catfish before, but man, that was awful.

 

The only person who I even remotely felt bad for was Sara Marie, but even she rubbed me the wrong way.  Thad seemed skeevy; "I just friended a bunch of people, girls AND guys to see if I could find someone to talk to" story seemed lame, especially b/c of his emphasis on the "anyone, guys too.  Not just cute chicks, I swear".  Between that and his perpetual "guilt", which seemed put on to me, I couldn't really find any sympathy for him. 

 

But, Ashley.  Clearly, Ashley is a nasty, manipulative piece who really loves the crazy lies she is actively perpetuating.  This chick is the real deal; all those other catfish who said they're the hardest core of the hardcore catfish have met their match in Ashley.  **Shudder** 

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Yeah. Ashley definitely gets a tank of her own. Man.

This season is really freaking me out.

I really think Max and Nev are pretty much out of their depth here.

OK I totally don't mean to make ocean/fish puns at this point.

 

My TiVo had some weird preview for a Catfish EP where someone seemed to have a thing for Max 

and he was saying "I'm married". I thought this week's EP might be it but no. Anyone know what that was about?

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WTF was that????? The ending made my jaw drop, & Nev "well, sorry to hear it's worse, but gotta go, see ya!" what the hell? Of course she wasn't going to stop, the show probably gave her a few ideas. I wonder how many catfish are going to come out of the woodwork after the show gets broadcast, because I think there are hundreds of her victims out there. Sara started out so strong when they first confronted her, but when she started crying because Ashley was crying about being fat (was anybody surprised by that? LOL), I knew she was getting played.There has to be something she can do legally to stop Ashley from pretending to be her, "we're engaged!" is pretty extreme.

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I can almost predict that this show is going to perpetuate a murder, after watching this episode. Harm is going to come to people if there is not some type of intervention by somebody with a clue about mental illness. Clearly, Nev and Max are not capable.

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Maybe if Thaddeus spent more time with his wife and kids than confronting some weirdo, things would be better for him. He'd already determined that some woman he'd spoken to for a month was a liar, so why not just move on? You didn't give her money, you didn't try to marry her-- she was just some rando you never met who you pursued and then unloaded your problems on. What difference does it make if her photos were fake-- you're married! I get why Sarah wouldn't be thrilled about it, but I really don't get why Thaddeus was even involved in this foolishness.

I also can't deal with the hyperbole from Nev and Max about all the "destruction" Ashley is causing. What destruction? Convincing a few guys that they like someone they've never met? If you're silly enough to fall in love with a text message, that's kind of on you. And even for the real Sarah-- it's not like this was identity theft where she was actually stealing your identity and ruining your credit. Relax, guys. Ashley was a crazy freak, but I'm just not seeing the danger.

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This was an interesting article in the Oklahoma City paper: http://newsok.com/article/5436774?utm_source=NewsOK.com&utm_medium=Social&utm_campaign=NIC-Facebook

It mentions how the real Sara's pictures are showing up in some not great places such as being attached to an account that talks about the fantasy of being abducted. That can't be good or safe for the real Sara.

Also? Holy crap! The effort Ashley put into this. Pretending to be a guy to get more info on Sara and the YouTube videos for the background noises. Wtf? I'm just baffled by how crazy she must be.

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And even for the real Sarah-- it's not like this was identity theft where she was actually stealing your identity and ruining your credit. Relax, guys. Ashley was a crazy freak, but I'm just not seeing the danger.

 

No, it's worse. She could be arrested for doing whatever Ashley is doing online if there is a case of mistaken identity and she's linked to any number of crimes, God forbid. Ashely is a dangerous person and should not be allowed anywhere near the Internet. I've seen people do less and be hauled into court and forbidden to be online. As I said earlier, I fear something dangerous will happen if people like this keep getting airtime on television. It just feeds them and makes them hungry for more fame.

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And even for the real Sarah-- it's not like this was identity theft where she was actually stealing your identity and ruining your credit. Relax, guys. Ashley was a crazy freak, but I'm just not seeing the danger.

Yeah, imagine if Ashley started using Sarah's real name and address with the guy that she was "engaged" to. This guy could come to Sarah's house expecting to meet his fiancé and then when Sarah rebuffs him and tries to explain, he snaps and causes physical harm to her.

There really needs to be some laws put out there to stop this stuff really quick. I wonder if Ashley even had a child or if that was part of her backstory for when she gets caught.

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If Ashley has a child I am the Queen of Romania. (spoiler alert--I'm not). Just more lies, she can't help herself. I knew she wouldn't delete the fake profile. I was hoping Nev and Max and Sara would pull out a laptop and invite her to do it right then. "Why not now? Here. I'll help you. You know its for the best."

 

Doesn't Facebook have rules about stuff like this?
 

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Facebook will remove someone's page if you can prove it's not you and that someone is pretending to be you. But, it takes an attorney stepping in for that to happen. They don't want to remove members unless forced to.

 

There are laws in place to protect people in cases such as this but Nev and Max are only interested in promoting their show.  I didn't hear them mention calling in legal help or getting Ashley to see a therapist.

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There are laws in place to protect people in cases such as this but Nev and Max are only interested in promoting their show.  I didn't hear them mention calling in legal help or getting Ashley to see a therapist.

Never mind that; they should be forwarding what they have to federal authorities for prosecution. If Nev had been paying any attention at all to Ashley after her boo-hoo act, he would have known that she had no intention of stopping. Or, maybe he did and felt he needed to stick to the show's formula. We found out last season that the producers are very skittish about deviating from the norm.

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 What difference does it make if her photos were fake-- you're married! I get why Sarah wouldn't be thrilled about it, but I really don't get why Thaddeus was even involved in this foolishness.

I came to the same conclusion...

 

And why was Nev looking in Ashley's window? That was so skeevy! I was so annoyed with him. It was like a fourteen year old move. He needs a girlfriend.

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If Ashley has a child I am the Queen of Romania. (spoiler alert--I'm not).

If she does, then who is taking care of it while she's spending twenty hours a day online with her catfishing?

 

Aside from the fake seizures and fake kidnapping, it looked like Ashley at least initially did give Thaddeus some reasonable advice about talking things out with his wife.

 

The main thing I noticed about this episode was that the ENTIRE story was repeated FOUR fucking times in the first twenty five minutes, with no new information given, but hammering away about Thad and his "guilt" and "need for punishment" blah blah blah.  The confrontation was dramatic enough on its own, I would have thought.

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This was an interesting article in the Oklahoma City paper: http://newsok.com/article/5436774?utm_source=NewsOK.com&utm_medium=Social&utm_campaign=NIC-Facebook

It mentions how the real Sara's pictures are showing up in some not great places such as being attached to an account that talks about the fantasy of being abducted. That can't be good or safe for the real Sara.

Also? Holy crap! The effort Ashley put into this. Pretending to be a guy to get more info on Sara and the YouTube videos for the background noises. Wtf? I'm just baffled by how crazy she must be.

 

All parties involved are going to be local pseudo-celebs! I kinda feel bad for Thad's family since the incident got on the news as well as on MTV.... But, not really.... ;-x

Edited by OrientalAmish

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Maybe this will lead to charges being filed? I don't know, laws vary from state to state, but seriously....

I know, I read the article, & law enforcement doesn't seem to be able to do anything. If Ashley tried to get a loan using Sara's info, wouldn't that be illegal? If she's using it to possibly get money from guys, why isn't that illegal? In this day & age, there should be laws about stealing someone's identity online.

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I agree. Internet abuse laws are very slow to catch up with what we term "real life" laws. It takes someone getting murdered to make things happen, unfortunately.

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From the recap:

I sincerely doubt she's 6'1"?

That's only 3 inches more than Nev; less if her height is being rounded up and his down. Allow for the angle of the photo and the low shoes she's wearing and it looks about right.

 

 

In this day & age, there should be laws about stealing someone's identity online.

There are, but it would have to be reported to the FBI. Local cops would just say there's nothing they can do because there isn't.

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I kind of got the feeling that Nev and company took this case one based off of Sarah's predicament, didn't she do a #Nev or catfish or something.  I'm wondering if they decided this was just like another story where the girl (Sarah) contacts them b/c some other psycho (Ashley) is using her pictures, but they wanted to go a different angle...from one of the guys that Ashley had fooled.  They asked Sarah about some of the guys that had contacted her after finding out they had been fooled, and this is how we got Thad.

 

I just can't figure out why Thad would continue on this journey after he found out he had been tricked, I mean what would be in it for him or his family.  Hell, I would think his wife would say just drop it.

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Hell, I would think his wife would say just drop it.

Unless she felt he deserved a little public humiliation. 

 

I think this season is the show's way of trying to freshen things up. At this point everybody knows what catfishing is, so just showing more people who fell in love with a liar is just wash, rinse, repeat IMO. I'm just not sure that what they've been doing has been all that successful, especially with Nev trying to redeem everyone at the end of every show.

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I'm still waiting for it to come out that they are paying the "catfisher" to come on camera to meet the ones they have wronged.  I just can't see any other reason for them to want to come on camera and show their face, other than that batshit crazy girl from a few episodes past who totally would have done it just for the fame aspect.

 

I've said this in the Food Network Star thread, but the Lifetime show UnREAL has really made me second guess every reality show as to how scripted every little tiny detail is.

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The only time I've seen that many crosses in someone's home on a reality show, it was one of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills who appeared one season. She was into some pretty kinky stuff. Maybe that's his thing?

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Ashley had some criminal stuff that she didn't want to discuss. I wonder if she were to be on probation if all this catfishing could mess with it. I just want there to be some consequences for her. After this episode airs, people should find it if they google Sarah's name, I guess. I was disappointed they didn't try to get anyone into therapy.

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The only time I've seen that many crosses in someone's home on a reality show, it was one of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills who appeared one season. She was into some pretty kinky stuff. Maybe that's his thing?

The Osbournes had a pretty impressive collection in their home, too.

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I have a small collection of Mexican folk art crosses on my wall. Anybody coming into my place would think I was a Christian, but I just like the way they look grouped together.

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I actually thought that was really rude of Max & Nev to do. When somebody invites you into their home, you don't make fun of how they decorate or actually take things off the wall & play with them. It didn't come up in the episode, but if Thad or his wife were very religious, I would think making fun of the religious symbols they have in their house would be kind of insulting.

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I actually thought that was really rude of Max & Nev to do. When somebody invites you into their home, you don't make fun of how they decorate or actually take things off the wall & play with them. It didn't come up in the episode, but if Thad or his wife were very religious, I would think making fun of the religious symbols they have in their house would be kind of insulting.

 

It wasn't their house; because he's a (former) corrections officer, they said they met at his friend's house. Not that it's less rude, but at least they weren't doing it to the homeowners' faces?

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It wasn't their house; because he's a (former) corrections officer, they said they met at his friend's house. Not that it's less rude, but at least they weren't doing it to the homeowners' faces?

Unless the homeowner was off screen when it was being filmed, but they were going to see them when they broadcast the show, so it amounts to the same thing. 

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So, Alice catfished the show...I never believed a thing she was saying, it was all so pat, so rehearsed, so easy...if someone was really that self-aware and resolved, then they would have stopped catfishing years ago...and also no, nothing she said really explained the fake kidnappings and seizures.  And she doesn't just say 'I was kidnapped,' she spends like six hours on the phone hamming it up and uses youtube recordings and bangs brooms against the wall and stuff.  Her story about being stood up at the altar also sounded suspiciously similar to her own insane fakeouts.

  

I wish Nev or Max had called her on how 'summed up' her whole diatribe was and confronted her a bit more.  She was just saying what they wanted to hear, and she was so good at it, just like she's good at scamming people online and committing larceny.  I hope she doesn't really have a daughter living with her in that sketchy, boarded up house, but if she exists, it's probably just the future identity theft victim (like Nev's original catfish, who used her estranged daughter's photos to reel him in.)   But I think the fiance and the daughter were probably borrowed from some stranger's life story that she found online.  No one mentioned gifts or money (engagement rings?) but I bet she scams the hell out of these people too and that's how she manages to 'stay at home.'

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I lost all the potential empathy for her once they showed that she continued with the pretending. One thing is to lie about your name online, another thing is to steal someone's identity and get serious with a person!

Everybody felt sometimes like she felt, so she is no exception. No energy and will to change things, I guess. Very sad.

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I have often wondered about the people whose photos are being used for this activity. On this show, they often show the person's real photos time and again without actually having them on the show and I wondered if they had to get permission to do that and what it must be like to see your photos being used under false pretenses.

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Once you post a photo online, it's fair game. That's what a lot of people don't understand. Names are different, however, which is why you often see the last name blurred out.

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I have often wondered about the people whose photos are being used for this activity. On this show, they often show the person's real photos time and again without actually having them on the show and I wondered if they had to get permission to do that and what it must be like to see your photos being used under false pretenses.

I recall reading somewhere- probably on here- that they don't usually (always?) use the real picture that the catfish used for the episodes.  My memory is a little spotty so that may or may not be correct.  I think cooksdelight is right, though.  Once you post your photos they're up for grabs, so...

 

While trying to google the information above so I kinda sounded like I knew what I was talking about (didn't find it, but I didn't look super hard), I did find this article.  It is kind of old, but it does address the concerns people have posted, especially this episode, about therapy. 

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Once you post a photo online, it's fair game. That's what a lot of people don't understand.

 

That's not actually true for a show like this, as I've written in past Show-o-Matic posts. On Nev's podcast (R.I.P., apparently), he's explained that they do have to clear every photo they use, so in cases where they don't get the real people's permission to use their stolen photos on the show, they use stock photos that resemble the real ones.

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That's not actually true for a show like this, as I've written in past Show-o-Matic posts. On Nev's podcast (R.I.P., apparently), he's explained that they do have to clear every photo they use, so in cases where they don't get the real people's permission to use their stolen photos on the show, they use stock photos that resemble the real ones.

That's much more succinctly said than what I posted.  And much more clear. Thanks!

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Yeah. Ashley definitely gets a tank of her own. Man.

This season is really freaking me out.

I really think Max and Nev are pretty much out of their depth here.

OK I totally don't mean to make ocean/fish puns at this point.

The show has fallen off the continental shelf into the Mariana Trench :)

the YouTube videos for the background noises. Wtf? I'm just baffled by how crazy she must be.

That one reminded me of the original Nightmare on Elm Street, where Johnny Depp plays a cassette tape of airplane noises to convince his parents that he's staying with a cousin or friend by the airport.

The main thing I noticed about this episode was that the ENTIRE story was repeated FOUR fucking times in the first twenty five minutes, with no new information given, but hammering away about Thad and his "guilt" and "need for punishment" blah blah blah.  The confrontation was dramatic enough on its own, I would have thought.

A lot of "one hour" (ha) shows have this issue with excessive filler and recaps but Catfish is among the worst offenders. The actual investigation and any useful little hints about sniffing out a fraud take up five minutes or less. It makes me think about the old joke about being able to fit Jerry Falwell in a matchbox if you gave him an enema.

I was surprised that Ashley used her real last name (per the grandpa's obit) on her Facebook account.

Edited by cheatincheetos
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Maybe if Thaddeus spent more time with his wife and kids than confronting some weirdo, things would be better for him. He'd already determined that some woman he'd spoken to for a month was a liar, so why not just move on? You didn't give her money, you didn't try to marry her-- she was just some rando you never met who you pursued and then unloaded your problems on. What difference does it make if her photos were fake-- you're married! I get why Sarah wouldn't be thrilled about it, but I really don't get why Thaddeus was even involved in this foolishness.

I also can't deal with the hyperbole from Nev and Max about all the "destruction" Ashley is causing. What destruction? Convincing a few guys that they like someone they've never met? If you're silly enough to fall in love with a text message, that's kind of on you. And even for the real Sarah-- it's not like this was identity theft where she was actually stealing your identity and ruining your credit. Relax, guys. Ashley was a crazy freak, but I'm just not seeing the danger.

Actually it could be dangerous  didn't you see the epsiode where the catfish was bullying people  using a fake identity and people were confronting the real girl about the words  the bully was saying online.  Or how that same catfish would exchange sexually explicit messages with men  and then guys would approach the real girl thinking it was her sending them the messages

 

things like that can ruin people social reputation , maybe job prospects and maybe even get themselves an asskicking if the person is in a relationship. These people playing around online  don't  care about all that. They just want to trick people online

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I think the show should invest in a mental health specialist who can provide some insight into why the people cat fishing do so & refer them to services that can help because it is becoming a dangerous issue in this new age of social media and the Internet. I know it's for entertainment purely though but the show is becoming progressively scarier in the kinds of people they discover and the amount of people it affects. One day they could be knocking on the door of a serial killer or rapist or peadophile that puts themselves in danger as well. At least some investigation from relevant authorities or provision of mental health services to catfishes rather than brushing it off as oh well we tried stay tuned for more could help in decreasing this problem and raise awareness for people to have more caution online as well as letting catfishes know there is help (or negative consequences if they don't want to stop) for whatever personal issues they are dealing with that motivate them to engage in this behaviour with numerous victims.

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This episode was on again today, which I saw for the first time.  I had to search to see if there were any updates since 2015.  Sarah worked with her local rep to get it into state law that the wronged party can sue the person stealing pictures and identity online (where no money taken just identity, such in this case).  I think she was planning to sue or did sue Ashley.  Good for Sarah.  And what I found was that Ashley took old stuff off of My Space.  Damn.  

I did a quick search and neither seemed to have Facebook accounts (Sarah or Ashley).  I did find an article where someone else had done a background on Ashley; she was arrested for larceny (seemed like petty theft) and for drug paraphernalia found in her car (I think it was her car).  Along with that they also found a small amount of black tar heroin.   I was like holy shit, this chick is more dangerous than what was shown.  I would seriously be moving and keeping everything secret - off line if I were Sarah, delete every account anywhere.  Then I remembered that Ashley had posted stuff of Sarah's family, so she probably knew all the details about them.  Scary.  I may be old fashioned, but I don't post a lot of personal shit online.  

I thought it was dangerous for the tv crew to confront Ashley.  They certainly didn't seem to help Sarah too much.  Good for her that she then got some resolution on her own.

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