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PhoneCop

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  1. PhoneCop

    Very Cavallari

    I actually found Kelly not completely intolerable with Jay, so I guess now I subscribe to the notion that she and Kristin bring out the unwatchable screechiness in each other. This is where I wish I knew what's going on in the producers' minds, because unless they're passive-aggressively throwing everyone under the bus, why do they consistently show Kristin to be an inept leader, running a company of incompetents (and Brittainy) who appear to be ganging up on the one visible POC? Not great optics and not a great advertisement for the brand. I mean, I won't be surprised if it eventually comes out that UJ is Jay's tax shelter/laundering front, but there are quieter ways of going about that than running a weekly series about it on E! for multiple seasons. Odd choices have been made here. All that aside, it still seems like the staff's problem with Kaylee is that she simply expects basic competence and they're just not up to it. Matt saying he'd been planning shipping operations for months? Yeah, okay, kid. I bet the PowerPoint was spectacular. And Colby might actually surpass Kelly in making me want to gouge out my eardrums—"like" doesn't have to be every third word, dear, it really doesn't—so she can return to being a background player whenever.
  2. No, I think that aspect of Jeff's powers was mentioned at some point, maybe even last season—I remember when Looker's goons were going in for the kill and I thought, "You dummies." This. Hyper-controlled electrolysis? Of course, I don't understand how an electrical forcefield could protect against Heatstroke's flames either...
  3. Huh, Markovia as next season's big bad. At least that pretty much guarantees we'll see Geo-Force realized in live action? Then maybe Jen will befriend an amnesiac girl with glowing powers of her own, or something. I actually thought for a second Lala's tattooed souls were gonna emerge from his body and take down Tobias, but this way works as well. Lynn laying down serious fist on Jace was perfectly satisfying anyway. I'm just glad there's gonna be a Season 3, what with all the unresolved weirdness this time out, Grace first and foremost. Will Teleporting Guy ever get a name? And I still question whether Looker is really down and out permanently.
  4. PhoneCop

    Very Cavallari

    Depends on the size of the company and the nature of the hierarchy, I imagine. If this were a normal situation, it sounds like Kaylee was high enough that dismissing her without Kristin's input would be highly unusual, but...this is UJ and Kristin hasn't done a stellar job of structuring things. It also raises this question: If Kaylee was let go while Kristin was at the Emmys and now Cyber Monday is upon us, that points to a gap of about two months. If Kaylee was so valuable an employee, why didn't Kristin look into the matter sooner than she did? Oh, right, manufactured drama. It's so weird that we have all these retconned employees and storylines. Well, retconned isn't the right word exactly, but it sure feels that way.
  5. PhoneCop

    Very Cavallari

    Redemption arc? LOL I'm fully willing to bet that the only real problem the staff has with Kaylee is that she calls their immature, shiftless selves out on their shit. Like Jay said, shipping is simply not that hard—mistakes will happen, but when we're talking empty boxes by the dozen, that almost certainly points to a crew of irresponsible fuck-ups who should have a taskmaster riding their asses, if not firing them outright.
  6. PhoneCop

    S38 Spoilers & Speculation

    Woo. Was that F6 list of Aubry/Joe/Kelley/Julia/Rick and either Gavin or Lauren debunked? Because that might point to Rick being the last Extinctionite standing, not Chris.
  7. Current me: Hey, 12YO me, in 35 years there'll be such a glut of superheroes on TV and film that a Black Lightning show will actually go so far as to include Looker and the Masters of Disaster. Except Looker will be evil and racist, and Heatstroke will be randomly gender-flipped for no apparent reason. 12YO me: WTF? Think I'll stay here in the '80s, TYVM. This season's been so very weird. As much as the central throughline is still fairly strong, I feel like all these odd sideplots like Lala's return and the Perdi have been jumping in and out of the bushes with no real sense of pacing or order, and...well, I still adore the cast and don't feel the wheels have come off the show like they have with Riverdale. But man, I hope Season 3 is more like Season 1.
  8. PhoneCop

    Very Cavallari

    Kelly might look like a catch on paper, but—at least from what we've seen on the show—she's vapid, self-absorbed, weirdly stunted from a relationship perspective, has an annoying stoner laugh...and we're only seeing edited footage of her. An entire conversation with her must be excruciating. I can imagine a lot of guys passing on a second date, especially anybody looking for anything serious. I kind of liked Pip in the brief scenes we got of her. Can we ditch Kelly and upgrade? Given the stage of life Kristin's at anyway, it'd make more sense if her obligatory onscreen friend is somebody who's becoming a parent rather than a 30-something airhead who can't sort out her dating life. The funny thing is that I'm starting to think Kelly would be a better match for Stone than the more ambitious Brittainy. Independent of the fact that Stone and Kelly are the two biggest dead weights in the cast and would pretty much deserve each other. If this were real life, Kristin would probably just lay waste to the shipping department, because it can't be that hard to find reasonably telegenic people with retail experience and a decent work ethic in a city the size of Nashville. But then I suppose we wouldn't have an arc for the show.
  9. PhoneCop

    S11.E02: Good God Girl, Get Out

    Here's what us old folks are talking about, kids: That was my favorite thing in the whole episode, just because I was...alive during that time and I would constantly hear Jane and Seduction on the same stations that spring.
  10. PhoneCop

    S07.E10: Climate Quick Change

    I have officially gone from wanting Michelle out for the last several weeks to thinking she's the winner this lousy footnote of a season deserves. The fug designs, the smug confessionals, the ill-conceived tattoos, the edgelord mullet...if 100K of someone else's money is the ransom that'll send her back into obscurity once and for all, I can live with that. I'm just so ready for the Lifetime era to end. I suppose I'll stick it out, but only to make sure the zombie is buried for good.
  11. PhoneCop

    I Am the Night

    Ooh, Corinna, that's another thing. I'm not sure what they were going for there—that's not how Connie Nielsen sounds IRL, I believe—but during their whole initial meeting, I just found myself hoping Fauna would say something like "Lady, I don't mean to be a bitch, but I find your accent and affectations exhausting. Like, there's 'art world denizen' and then there's whatever the hell you're doing."
  12. PhoneCop

    I Am the Night

    Well, that was certainly...six hours. Normally this is the kind of thing I love to go back and rewatch, but on the whole it was so impressionistic that I suspect I won't get much more out of a second go. At least Jefferson Mays kind of made me forget his Kimmy Schmidt role in the last episode?
  13. PhoneCop

    Very Cavallari

    Ha, I'm glad I'm not the only one who finds Kelly to be a total needle scratch of a human being—every time she pops up, she just kills whatever bit of momentum the show has going. Dear Producers: We don't care about the dating life of some rando who happens to know Kristin. Especially a grown woman who acts like a middle-schooler. Shannon should've been recast as the obligatory bestie. At least she doesn't need Kristin to prop her up during interviews. Brittainy may be a Romulan, but she's still too good for this. I see they greatly expanded the staff between seasons/are letting us into the back room, I'm not sure which. If that twink Matt becomes more prominent, I just might be willing to sit through another run of this.
  14. PhoneCop

    S16.E13: Holy Macau!

    I mean, that's how Nick Elmi did it... I've been rooting for Eric from the start and I've liked Kelsey ever she pointed out Southern cuisine's African roots, so I'll be happy with either of them winning. But I also agree there's been no real villain this season, just Sara having a few...lesser moments on camera and Brandon having resting sociopath face.
  15. PhoneCop

    S11.E01: Whatcha Unpackin?

    I don't know, All-Stars 4 seemed to drag out for months on end... I'm all for large casts, but man, this week's runway felt like a clown car demonstration. Guess I'll just blame the theme and hope for something that really lets the queens shine more as individuals.
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