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nachomama

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  1. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    I have not been to a Nascar race but a guy I used to work with went with his wife, he of course loved it. She was not fond, loud? YES smelly? YES and not to be forgotten you come home with blackface. As in there's enough burnt rubber in the air that you come home sooty and greasy. You can wipe it off with your finger. She was disgusted. I've been at a disadvantage music and concert and sports wise my whole life. I lived in the middle of nowhere New Mexico for the first part and we don't get great stuff here now. There are no professional sports teams here or there. I could be a Jacksonville Jaguars or Atlanta Hawks fan but either is still several hours drive. When I was in high school Bon Jovi was in Albuquerque and we ditched school and hauled ass to try and go but it was sold out. So we rented a motel room and got some dude to buy us beer and we got trashed. My friend James was about 6'5" and decided to get in the shower fully clothed so he's completely wet, we put him in the back of the car and drove home about 6 am. His mother was utterly confused at the pile of wet clothes. He kept mumbling "will you still respect me?"
  2. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    My sister got me, found me on facebook and sent me the link to the reunion. It's open to "all classes" but organized by '82-'85ers. My sister was '88 and I was a few years behind her. So I don't know these people, SHE don't know these people. She even posted some stupid garbage about buying dessert at Chi-Chi's which is a defunct restaurant chain since 2004! How smart does my sister look now? Plus, not sure if I mentioned this my sister doesn't have front teeth. No clue where her teeth went and she's still a bit young for dentures but girl aint got no front teeth but she's so damn happy to be trying to go to this reunion. This will not end well, this is worse than Romy and Michelle's high school reunion cuz at least they had a plan. My sister can't claim she invented invisible front teeth. I may have been bitten by a radioactive spider over the weekend. Housesitting for a friend so I came home from work at 6 am and passed out on the couch. Woke up to a dog french kissing me, like licking the hell outta my face and some weird bite on my shoulder. Looks like multi somethings. I don't think mosquito because of the multiple bites, not sure if ant or spider but I'm pretty sure I'll either die or have super powers.
  3. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    Compared to Nashville we are all gonna seem lame. First concert, Indigo Girls. I've seen Dixie Chicks 3x Alison Krause 4x Hootie and the blowfish smashmouth, Harry Connick jr. couple others. Not really met anyone famous, stood behind Josh Lucas when he was in town filming a movie and most idiot girls thought he was Matthew McConaughy. I met David Sedaris and he liked my hair. I believe I served coffee to Joel Silver (producer dude) he was filming something and came in and ordered some cappucino vanilla blah blah blah and I just said "Where do you think you are? Seattle?" We held out a long, long time and had no Starbucks until way late in the game. This woulda been 1993 ish. Someone told me afterwards that was Joel Silver. No sporting events. zip zero nada
  4. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    It never fails to amaze me to hear stories of 2 guys in high school and if they were beefing about a girl or whatever stupid thing and then they fight and then they're best friends. I don't get that. Two of my friends and I was shocked as hell that the smaller one, the quieter one, seemingly the less powerful in that face off was the one who "won". 9 times out of 10 the instigator is all bluff. One of those that counts on his friends to "hold him back" so when push comes to shove they got nothing. And just so you know, there is a woman behind me who insists on singing loudly with the radio or whatever she's listening to. AND ITS FUCKING ANNOYING. I'm at work, this isn't the bus, this is get your ass on the phone and quit singing some stupid ass shit about denying your baby mama. I actually though she was making it up as she went along. There's some really stupid music out there these days.
  5. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    I was thinking about that with some of the gay kids that we went to school with. Clearly a very rural town, long before anyone dared to think gay shouldn't be a slur. We had this poor kid Tracy, who in retrospect, was quite clearly transgendered. He liked to dress up like a woman on weekends. We went to a wedding once and he just happened to have the perfect earrings for me in his pocket. I know his life was hell. I know I never gave him shit but I also didn't stop anyone else. I have no doubt he's somewhere living as a woman whether he's had surgery or not. There was another kid in my history class and the jocks gave him a lot of shit for being gay. One day I guess he had enough. Someone was rocking his desk with their foot, just kinda thumping the little book rack underneath, I don't think they were intentionally trying to irritate him but it had come after a few under the breath comments so he stood up and smacked the kid with the foot on his desk. Utter shock all around. But it was enough and he wasn't bothered anymore.
  6. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    There are 2 people who I think I would still owe apologies to if we should ever cross paths. This one poor girl, Shelly, damn she was tiny and just tried so damn hard to fit in and in gym class she demanded that I punch her in the stomach. So she could prove she could take it. Our gym teacher had a thing where he said someone should be able to stand on your stomach. Like your muscles should be able to hold up if you clenched and someone stepped onto your tightened abs. So she wanted to prove how strong her stomach was so she pestered me for days to punch her. One day I did. She cried I felt terrible. cuz you know I wasn't even the best puncher. And Doug Gurley, I owe him one hell of an apology. I projectile vomited at the back of his head. My mother sent me to school even though I said I didn't feel well. A 30 minute bumpy school bus ride didn't help so YAAAARP there I went. Poor Doug, his face as he turned around thinking it's just water pistol or shenanigans. I was 6-7 ish, he was a freshman, You know he never lived that shit down. I have an alarming number of stories that involve throwing up.
  7. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    My former boss went to an elementary school reunion. I thought it was the weirdest thing I'd ever heard of, either first grade or fourth grade. He absolutely loved it, they got a great turnout. He said he has no interest in high school people but think about it, the most "friends" you've ever had were elementary school. before people turned into assholes. My school would have been the same people from 4th through high school so same difference. I know that people who are bullies have issues, there's something that drives them to be that way and it can resolve itself later or just continue on a path of destruction. It doesn't mean I have any sympathy for the people who were that way. I had a shitty childhood, I didn't take it out on other people. I did have a guy try to have a serious talk with me once, and apologize for his behavior. We had "dated" in high school but we never admitted to ourselves that we were dating. Like we did everything you do that constitutes high school dating, he drove me to school, we spent endless hours on the phone doing homework or whatever. We went to the school sporting events. We even made kissy faces and hickeys and stuff. But I think we both always assumed we could do better and thus it was never an official "thing". So here he is apologizing to me a few years after high school and I think to him he thought I pined over him or some shit or that maybe I thought of him as my first love or had some kind of big signifigance and he wanted to acknowledge that he treated me like crap. I was kind of laughing at him, he was never my be-all end-all.
  8. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    Maybe we weren't unique, we had a class of less than 100 though. My sister has recently been scheming to reconnect with her past so she wants to go to a reunion this June, our classes were so small that they "combine" reunions, it's like a 10 year stretch so I think she wants to hook me in, then she'd "get a ride" or something. She also plans on staying, as in she'd be leaving and some friend says they can get her a job at the dollar store. hahahahha because this pissant town we grew up in was sooooooo great that I got the heck outta Dodge and aint never been back but now she's gotta go. She currently lives with my other sister and cannot hold down a job. so what happens when she screws up the dollar store job? aint no other jobs. My other sister has already warned her she can't come back. She's been mooching off of her for over 5 years. In January she was hired as a cook at the senior citizens center, she believed God gave her the job and it's her "mission" to feed the elderly ... she was fired by Valentines day. For really stupid stuff, like the old people complained that she didn't let them fix their own biscuits and gravy. Like give them the biscuit, give them the gravy, let them assemble as they wish. But she would crumble up the biscuit and put the gravy on it. Same with strawberry shortcake, she crumbled up the whatever cake part and doused it with strawberries I guess maybe like a trifle? anywho they didn't like it. I like to say god fired her. She was recently hired to work in a laundromat...3 hours a day, 7 days a week, 30 mile round trip, how is that worth it??? Within the first week she left the door unlocked twice. If you catch my drift she aint too reliable. Anyway the reunions I've seen pictures of there are about 15 people and I don't know any of them. I've never been to one, I don't plan on it. I have 3 friends tops that I've kept in touch with and I'd be happy to see them, just not so much in the home town. maybe Vegas? So i don't care about this plan of hers.
  9. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    Was Jesus carrying them? :O Within just a couple years of graduating we had (I think) an abnormally high rate of dead former classmates. Now I do come from the highest blood alcohol content per capita region in the world. We beat all your big drinkers, Scotland, Ireland. So we lost a kid just days before our senior year started, went out drinking with his cousin and somehow ended up on the railroad tracks...then a kid named Nathaniel who was called "Nutty" through high school was dead a couple of years later from alcohol poisoning. Quite a few that just seemed too young, whether they were assholes or not in high school. We had a lot of dumb names, Nutty coming to mind, We also had a Boogie, my nickname was Joint. hahaha
  10. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    Oh no I didn't have a lunchbox in high school, I was elementary school. yes, it sounds super creepy but truly he only wanted to eat my cookies. that sounds even creepier. His name was Beaver Mckinney, like "leave it to Beaver" I do not even recall what his real name was. I had a mean girls situation, where technically the girl was my friend but we were academic rivals. Technically I think I won because I slept with her boyfriend (it was an accident!) and I was the valedictorian. but I always felt kinda shitty when I was competing with her. She went on the greater things, nice little family, I think they do ok for themselves. Maybe she won in the long run cuz I aint got shit. Since then I had never had a nemesis, until recently. Some cuckoo bitch who decided she didn't like me. We worked opposite shifts so it's not like she even worked with me or got to know me well enough to hate me, trust me, everyone hates me eventually. She had zero reason to gun for me other than purely throwing her weight around. She was made assistant manager and apparently cried quite often in the walk in cooler but she was determined she was manager material. She eventually got transferred to another store where she was manager, the entire staff quit so she quit.
  11. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    I am familiar with the fudge sticks, this would have been close but flatter and wider. not skinny sticks. plus the nuts. I wish I could remember their name. I had a "boyfriend" who was in high school...basically a stoner who liked to eat the cookies in my lunchbox so he called me his girlfriend and because I'm not very bright I was convinced I was actually his girlfriend, actually got jealous when he got a REAL girlfriend.
  12. I have adored Ryan Hurst since forever! He was Opie on Sons of Anarchy and I turned my back on that show when they let Opie go. Nope Nope Nopie! I don't know how well I will do with him being evil. Then he is in a little known movie "Lone Star State of Mind" with Joshua Jackson, my sister just raved about this movie, loved loved loved it, had to get it on dvd. Usually this spells, not good, to me. It literally sounded like the stupidest thing on earth. Joshua Jackson is trying to leave his little Texas town, all packed, ready to go and all hell breaks loose, his friends (ryan hurst) "accidently" rob a bank, he "accidently" gets shot by his girlfriend, I think he gets shot a couple of times. Stupid? yes but highly entertaining. I did have to purchase it as well.
  13. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    I used to love some kind of cookie that my mom would put in my lunches, it was some kind of Keebler product and it had wafer things, kinda like what's inside a kitkat, then caramel, covered in chocolate and nuts. They kinda looked like a harmonica and I would eat them sideways like a harmonica. I would scrape off all the nuts with my teeth then eat them layer by layer. I was a weird kid and I don't know if those cookies even sound appealing to me now. Of the girl scout cookies that exist, I would like the formerly known as Samoans and thin mints are ok but definitely the coconutty ones are better. although call me a bad American I do not purchase girl scout cookies because they are a terrible value. you get like 4 cookies for 60 gazillion dollars. I know, I know raising money for the kids blah blah.
  14. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    ok, tater dog is new to me. I guess weenies, of the beanie and skettios variety were the go-to protein for children. We usually got the knock off or off brand lunch boxes and toys. Like my Barbie was an unofficial Barbie, and at some point a "home-made" cabbage patch kid which was ugly as sin. Not home-made like my mother made it but some lady in town made them and my mother bought one. We weren't getting the name brand toys. We didn't get a "light bright" but some kind of peg board and we just punched random holes in paper, no pre-made designs. I did get Donnie and Marie Barbies at one point. Santa brought them although there was a note from Santa that Marie didn't make it on the sleigh xmas eve so she could be picked up in town at the western auto store after xmas :D And hoo boy Donnie and Marie made out a lot because I wasn't quite clear on the brother/sister relationship, I thought they were married. so they had babies and everything. My father did have questions when all the male barbies were walking around with no pants. Basically the first time you bent them over to have them sit on the furniture (couches and beds were made out of maxi pads stolen from the bathroom) anyway, the boys all split their pants so they just wandered around with no pants. Donnie had a purple jumpsuit so Donnie was more naked than the rest. My father was very bothered by this. .
  15. nachomama

    Small Talk: Ughngnggh! Ugghhnnn!

    I enjoyed HR Puffenstuff but even as a child I knew that was some fucked up shit, yo. Witchie Poo and the kid with the flute scared me equally. The child catcher in Chitty, Chitty, Bang, Bang was the scariest thing every to me. I loved the claymation christmas specials, loved Riki Tiki Tavi, loved Godzilla movies. Puff the Magic Dragon. I used to race into the room to watch the Carol Burnett cartoon, I thought the whole show was just the cartoon cleaning woman that was the credits. Once again, I was not a bright child.
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