S05.E11: James K's Story 2017.03.15

2 hours ago, Anchorabu said:

"But its what ah wahnnntttt..."

James should have that tattooed across his forehead!  It would save him time from saying it ALL DAY LONG!  It really is his motto.  Quite frankly, given that he so enjoys laying in bed nakid all day, having someone bathe and attend to his every bodily function and cook and practically feed him, I am surprised he doesn't require Lisa to pre-chew his food and spit it right into his mouth!  Because it is "what hee wahnnnts!"

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OSM dad and I ate Chinese food last night. We also had friiiiiiiiiied rice. However, we sat up at the table and had reasonable amounts.  I'm still shaking my head at James.. What a waste of a life.  

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26 minutes ago, Dru Blood said:

I am surprised he doesn't require Lisa to pre-chew his food and spit it right into his mouth!  Because it is "what hee wahnnnts!"

Haha!! 😂 😆 

If he's reading this that may have given him ideas 😜

Ow, mah jaw!

Edited by Anchorabu.
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I never paid much attention to the opening credits of this show, but after seeing James' episode, whenever his "Ow! Muh laygs!" segment appears in the opening, it will be like nails on a chalkboard for me. That exclamation coming out of his mouth is a symbol for every destructive thing he has done to his body, all the ways he has abused those trying to help him, and his complete unwillingness to endure any kind of physical discomfort.

Those three words pretty much sum up his wasted life.

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I feel like singing a rendition of the Lambchop song:

This is the thread that doesn't end

Yes it goes on and on my friend

Goodness bless anyone who has been able to watch this 3, 4, 6(what the what) times. I managed 2 and in doing so realized that I should've known James wasn't about shit when during the whole trying to get transport down to Texas he abandoned his diet saying what was the point of dieting if he couldn't get down to TX. Um... weight loss fool!  He really expected Dr. Now to break out a magic wand and make it all better. 

I was also really reminded of the show Intervention. Really I just thought everything Jeff VanDonderen every said was applicable. In particular "When their problem becomes their problem, the odds go up that they'll get better." If people refused to bring him bad food, wipe his ass, change his shitty sheets and pads, empty piss bags, wash him, and just generally be at his beg and call, I bet his ass would be more inclined to lose weight - hell he would be forced to. Changes in his case required discomfort. James K loved the life he lives and was/is unwilling to be uncomfortable for even a moment as witnessed by trying to move his ass just to wipe it, let alone move it cross country. Nothing changes if nothing changes.

Lisa and Bayley need whatever the Al-Anon version of aiding a morbidly obese person. I really wish Lisa and Bayley would adopt this quote: "The bottom line message of an intervention is 'There is nothing we won't do to help you get better. But there is nothing more we will do to help this continue anymore. We're done."

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1 hour ago, Tabbygirl521 said:

James K's family DOES love him like crazy, emphasis on CRAZY.    him to death.

Fixed that for ya! 

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2 hours ago, islandgal140 said:

Goodness bless anyone who has been able to watch this 3, 4, 6(what the what) times. I managed 2 and in doing so realized that I should've known James wasn't about shit when during the whole trying to get transport down to Texas he abandoned his diet saying what was the point of dieting if he couldn't get down to TX. Um... weight loss fool!  He really expected Dr. Now to break out a magic wand and make it all better. 

I can't believe I've listened to this mess at work. Twice. When you listen and don't watch (hey, I'm supposed to be working...) the voices just grate on you like crazy. Lisa's half dead tone, excusing everything she does. James' whining and yelling at people who are helping him. These are people you can't help but dislike, even when you don't see them (I'm torn with Lisa. She's obviously beaten down, but Greyhound runs every day. If you want me to be sympathetic, take Bayley and get out.).

This is where I want to smack people... Do not lay up in bed moaning, "I wish I could get out of this bed." or "It's not fair that other people get to do things I can't do." James actually sounded angry that he couldn't leave the bed after his father got sick. Dude, you weren't in a car crash. You don't have some degenerative disease or condition.  You ate yourself to this state. If you wanted to walk, you'd have taken matters in hand when you were 3-400 pounds. Don't complain to me that there's stuff you can't do when you've brought this on yourself.

TLC hit pay dirt with this one. I might even pay $1.99 on amazon video so I can have a version with good sound and picture, compared to the terrible versions (to avoid copyright issues) on YT.

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In the beginning, if James thought Dr. Now's diet was to restrictive all he needed to do to lose weight was to eat half of whatever Lisa brought him to eat.

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4 hours ago, islandgal140 said:

 

Lisa and Bayley need whatever the Al-Anon version of aiding a morbidly obese person. I really wish Lisa and Bayley would adopt this quote: "The bottom line message of an intervention is 'There is nothing we won't do to help you get better. But there is nothing more we will do to help this continue anymore. We're done."

Al-anon serves families of all addicts including food. 

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Pretty clear that we all are "frustrated" with James.  What a piece of work.  I've watched the episode 6 times now.  Sorry, not sorry.  And it's on again tomorrow and I'll watch again.  If there's an update, I bet it would be like Penny's ... not helping himself and happy in his bed laying in his pee and poop.  I don't thing I have friends who would come over and roll me over to clean me up.  Lisa has good friends from reading her FB, and that's good.  Wonder how many have tried to break this bond and talk some sense into her.  But where would she go?  Someone would take her in.  And someone would help her poison his food too.  There would be no autopsy.  
 

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Re-watching James...don't know why I do this to myself...GRRRR....

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On 3/27/2017 at 7:52 PM, swankie said:

We have some pretty terrible choices here in Kentucky also!  Krispy Kreme Donut burgers.  These donuts alone are pure sugar so someone decided to load burgers, bacon and cheese between them.  An artery's nightmare!  LOL!

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Good God, a heart attack in a bag!

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4 minutes ago, 55Unicorns said:

Re-watching James...don't know why I do this to myself...GRRRR....

Hahahaha 55Unicorns, I was just about to post the same thing, that's he's on again right now. Funny, there so many grotesque details about this man that it seems one learns something new with every viewing. I just "happened" to click on TLC, tee hee, and there he was. I don't think I'll re-watch all of it again right now.

However, in the few minutes I just saw, I noted two things I really didn't notice in previous viewings. One, he said that when he wakes up, all he wants is his biscuits, eggs, and sausage smothered in gravy, that he eats that EVERY SINGLE DAY! Which leads to the second thing. Lisa and Bayley kept asking him exactly how much and how to prepare each step of the meal: how many biscuits, how much sausage, and he would "instruct" them (crumble the biscuits, lots of gravy over everything, etc.), and not in a nice way.

What struck me as weird was, how the Hell do you anxiously crave the same damn meal for breakfast every day AND why all of the detailed back and forth to make the exact same meal every day?

Weird.

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47 minutes ago, DC Gal in VA said:

What struck me as weird was, how the Hell do you anxiously crave the same damn meal for breakfast every day AND why all of the detailed back and forth to make the exact same meal every day?

Well, when you find what works, you stick with it.  I go through periods where I insatiably crave the same foods over and over, with no variety.

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I think one of the funnier things he says, during the Chinese food scene is "My next appointment is coming up with the doctor, but I don't think I can g o,  Ive got too much going on right now." 

Going on?  What could that possibly be??

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I often have cream of wheat and eggs in the morning. However I eat 2 eggs and a packet of cream of wheat. Then I have a cup of tea and I'm done.

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1 minute ago, LuciaMia said:

I think one of the funnier things he says, during the Chinese food scene is "My next appointment is coming up with the doctor, but I don't think I can g o,  Ive got too much going on right now." 

Going on?  What could that possibly be??

He's too busy laying in bed!

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"Now is not a good time to leave my family...". Really?  Whatcha got going there, James?  OY...

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34 minutes ago, Michael Stabosz said:

Well, when you find what works, you stick with it.  I go through periods where I insatiably crave the same foods over and over, with no variety.

Which is fine, if that works for you.  But why would Lisa and Bayley need step by step instructions on how to prepare food that they prepare Every.  Single.  Day?  They would know by now that he requires 6 eggs and 6 sausages and 6 biscuits, crumbled.  With LOTS of gravy over everything.

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48 minutes ago, Michael Stabosz said:

Well, when you find what works, you stick with it.  I go through periods where I insatiably crave the same foods over and over, with no variety.

Yeah, I get that, and I have my own true confession. This past Thanksgiving I made a pretty traditional Thanksgiving, all the usual suspects including homemade cranberry sauce. Well, after Thanksgiving, I always look forward to "The Sammich" as I call it: potato bread, perhaps lightly toasted, real, full fat mayo both sides, leftover turkey, stuffing, and cranberry sauce. No lettuce and tomatoes, please. Heh heh, I ate FIVE of those bad boys in about a week or so!

I guess I understand being a creature of habit--once knew a guy who ate so much delivery pizza he constantly qualified for multiple free pizzas. What I just can't wrap my head around is craving the same meal seven days a week as James said. I mean, I love my Thanksgiving "Sammich" but there's no way I'd still be eating it in March, LOL!

As you said about yourself, you go through periods of craving certain foods, but not day in and day out.

James reminds me of all these 600+ pounders in their--as Dr. Now would say--"mind boggling" capacity to not only eat but crave the same crappy food over and over and over again, with most of them eating their meals from the exact same fast food joints.

At least James' meal was homemade. Uh oh, did I just say something positive about him and his family? Yikes!!!

Edited by DC Gal in VA. Reason: To add additional comments.
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34 minutes ago, Ocean Chick said:

Which is fine, if that works for you.  But why would Lisa and Bayley need step by step instructions on how to prepare food that they prepare Every.  Single.  Day?  They would know by now that he requires 6 eggs and 6 sausages and 6 biscuits, crumbled.  With LOTS of gravy over everything.

They don't. That was recreated for the cameras, so WE would know what they do every day.

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58 minutes ago, Ocean Chick said:
1 hour ago, Michael Stabosz said:

 

Which is fine, if that works for you.  But why would Lisa and Bayley need step by step instructions on how to prepare food that they prepare Every.  Single.  Day?  They would know by now that he requires 6 eggs and 6 sausages and 6 biscuits, crumbled.  With LOTS of gravy over everything.

Hmmm I wonder if all that discussion was for the camera? Maybe the producers told them to do it so we can fully know the numbers of exactly how much he's stuffing in his pie-hole every day, and how he's such a controlling jerk about every facet of his food consumption.

Edit:  Or, what Okerry said! 😊

Edited by Anchorabu.
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Watching again for probably the 7th time right now.  Lisa was lamenting her life and if James ever walks again that she'll leave, but she feels trapped until then.  This was right before she went to sleep on the floor.  :(  Anyway, reading her FB, she posted that they'll be in Houston "for years".  Talk about trapped.  Her entire family and friends are back in Kentucky so she has no one but James, who is very much an abuser -- verbally.  And if they can't get a tire fixed, you KNOW there's no way they can get back to Kentucky.  

I'd help buy her a ticket home if she'd use it.  Let James be someone else's problem, but a nursing home in't equipped for someone of his size.  Not her problem.  Flee Lisa, you can fix your miserable life and you can't fix James'.  

I'd want Penny as my BFF before even meeting James.  Honestly, he's more awful at each viewing.

Edited by Otter.
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27 minutes ago, Otter said:


I'd want Penny as my BFF before even meeting James.  Honestly, he's more awful at each viewing.

So true! I've watched this countless times (I can't help myself!) and he's more repugnant each time. I keep noticing more and more nuances to his passive aggressive abuse. Poor Lisa, it's like Stockholm Syndrome, she will never leave her captor. 

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54 minutes ago, Otter said:

Her entire family and friends are back in Kentucky so she has no one but James, who is very much an abuser -- verbally.  And if they can't get a tire fixed, you KNOW there's no way they can get back to Kentucky.  

Her family needs to get her out of there and let James K wallow in his own shit like the hog that he is.  Oh, wait...I forgot.  Hogs are actually very clean animals.  James can't make the same claim.  

I found it very interesting, and upsetting, when James declares that HE "ain't gonna pay no parking fees."  How does James pay for ANYTHING?

One of the most effective tactics of any abuser is to isolate the victim from family and friends.  Not only has James managed to do that, but he has sentenced Lisa to a lifetime of constant servitude.

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5 minutes ago, bethster2000 said:

One of the most effective tactics of any abuser is to isolate the victim from family and friends.  Not only has James managed to do that, but he has sentenced Lisa to a lifetime of constant servitude.

You are so right about that. I've seen other abusers do that, too. One day their victim looks up and realizes that they have absolutely no one to lean on for support of any kind, except the abuser.

And you gotta hand it to James - maybe this is what he means about being so effective with "the female persuasion." He's managed to totally isolate Lisa from every last one of her friends and family, and his shitty ass (literally) can't even get out of bed.

If ever there was abuse personified, it's James.

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9 minutes ago, okerry said:

You are so right about that. I've seen other abusers do that, too. One day their victim looks up and realizes that they have absolutely no one to lean on for support of any kind, except the abuser.

And you gotta hand it to James - maybe this is what he means about being so effective with "the female persuasion." He's managed to totally isolate Lisa from every last one of her friends and family, and his shitty ass (literally) can't even get out of bed.

If ever there was abuse personified, it's James.

Damn... I never thought of it that way.  What a f!!!!king train wreck...

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13 minutes ago, okerry said:

You are so right about that. I've seen other abusers do that, too. One day their victim looks up and realizes that they have absolutely no one to lean on for support of any kind, except the abuser.

And you gotta hand it to James - maybe this is what he means about being so effective with "the female persuasion." He's managed to totally isolate Lisa from every last one of her friends and family, and his shitty ass (literally) can't even get out of bed.

If ever there was abuse personified, it's James.

It must be really hard for the camera operators and producers to watch something like this and do nothing. I wonder if they try privately to urge her to get help.

James probably thinks that's what being effective at "female persuasion" means - being able to get her to be your slave.

Edited by MillieSparklepants.
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7 minutes ago, MillieSparklepants said:

It must be really hard for the camera operators and producers to watch something like this and do nothing. I wonder if they try privately to urge her to get help.

James probably thinks that's what being effective at "female persuasion" means - being able to get her to be your slave.

Dr. Now sends his patients to counseling, but Lisa isn't his patient.  He can do nothing for her and may not realize the verbal abuse she's subjected to constantly.  Hoping that changed if he even watches the show.  Watching again today, the sleeping on the floor submission so broke my heart.  Yet she repeats it with her own daughter by taking her out of school leaving her not able to make a life for herself beyond poverty.  Constant verbal abuse is worse than being hit believe it nor not.  She doesn't feed him what he wants to please him -- she does it to protect herself.  I'm no expert on DV so MOO but some experience.  

And the show people ... there was an Intervention where a junkie teen OD'ed with the BF.  They called for help -- he was too stoned to even notice she was dying.  

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26 minutes ago, MillieSparklepants said:

It must be really hard for the camera operators and producers to watch something like this and do nothing. I wonder if they try privately to urge her to get help.

James probably thinks that's what being effective at "female persuasion" means - being able to get her to be your slave.

It could be that the film crew knows the best way they can help Lisa is to document the abuse and put it out there for the world to see, which is exactly what they did.

And yes, I think you're exactly right when it comes to James's opinion on females. Slave, indeed.

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When you think about it, these folks spend countless hours with the film crews and producers.  What a fascinating relationship that is - witnessing extreme dysfunction, then stepping back to normal life. 

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43 minutes ago, okerry said:

You are so right about that. I've seen other abusers do that, too. One day their victim looks up and realizes that they have absolutely no one to lean on for support of any kind, except the abuser.

And you gotta hand it to James - maybe this is what he means about being so effective with "the female persuasion." He's managed to totally isolate Lisa from every last one of her friends and family, and his shitty ass (literally) can't even get out of bed.

If ever there was abuse personified, it's James.

Excellent observations okerry. It's both frightening and so disheartening to see that man wield such psychological control over another human being from his giant, shitty bed. That power must be so intoxicating to him, the selfish assed slug.

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I think every bite James takes is like a snort of cocaine.

But what's Lisa's cocaine?  Her demeanor and dead eyes - she's like a "ho" in a crack house who doesn't even bother to put her clothes back on. I guess her "high" is being needed. 

Whatever the answer is, it's one of the most messed up things I've ever seen. I'm another one who signed on and found this forum due to the show.  How can you process such craziness without talking it over with others?

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I think James is like methadone for Lisa - there's no high, just the prevention of going through the pain of withdrawal. Of having to change your life. No high, no withdrawal, just day after day of not feeling good/not feeling (that) bad. As long as she doesn't confront him, she doesn't have to go through even more abuse or the chaos and effort of trying to start over. Methadone.

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13 minutes ago, okerry said:

I think James is like methadone for Lisa - there's no high, just the prevention of going through the pain of withdrawal. Of having to change your life. No high, no withdrawal, just day after day of not feeling good/not feeling (that) bad. As long as she doesn't confront him, she doesn't have to go through even more abuse or the chaos and effort of trying to start over. Methadone.

You nailed it.

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And that deadness is part of abuse.  Kind of like PTSD.  Yet they refuse to leave.  Dr, Now can do nothing for her himself.  But he could somehow intervene.  He could at least not berate her like she's plotting his murder.  But no one would fault her if she carried it out.  I believe there's a phrase in Texas justice -- "He deserved kinlling".  Not advocating murder, but that woman is at the end of her rope and last nerve.

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1 hour ago, okerry said:

I think James is like methadone for Lisa - there's no high, just the prevention of going through the pain of withdrawal. Of having to change your life. No high, no withdrawal, just day after day of not feeling good/not feeling (that) bad. As long as she doesn't confront him, she doesn't have to go through even more abuse or the chaos and effort of trying to start over. Methadone.

Good comparison. Someone a few pages ago (DC Gal?) made an excellent point about Lisa. She stays because if she leaves, she has to admit that he's been using her this whole time and may not, probably not, have ever really loved her. To admit you let someone use and abuse you for decades would be an extremely painful realization. But as long as things stay the same, she can pretend he loves her because she helps him. I dunno, she's in a complicated situation and not entirely blameless, but I do feel bad for her.

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1 hour ago, MillieSparklepants said:

Good comparison. Someone a few pages ago (DC Gal?) made an excellent point about Lisa. She stays because if she leaves, she has to admit that he's been using her this whole time and may not, probably not, have ever really loved her. To admit you let someone use and abuse you for decades would be an extremely painful realization. But as long as things stay the same, she can pretend he loves her because she helps him. I dunno, she's in a complicated situation and not entirely blameless, but I do feel bad for her.

Yep, that was me MillieSparklepants. I took no joy in saying that, but I think she would rather be his forever doormat than admit that this beast has chewed up and spit out the best years of her life.

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I have a real problem with them exposing Bailey to this disaster. This is an insanely abusive tragic situation, and she seems like she has a chance at making it, but that will decrease every year she's exposed to this. They took her out of school? He doesn't even care enough about his daughter to try? He demands full on desert while eating plates of food that are insanely large? Ugh. I'm so frustrated. I know the show is called My 600 lb life, so it focuses on James, but I wish there was a focus on the daughter. How could they do that to her? Based on the reaction this episode got, I'm betting they will do a follow up, and the producers should know, we don't care if James can sit up. I want to see that girl get away from that mess. 

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On 3/21/2017 at 2:48 PM, operalover said:

I guess it's because if you live long enough it eventually happens to almost everyone. My dad had it done around 78 years old and he had perfect vision his whole life. I am sure I'll need to get it too some day. I don't wear glasses or anything now. 

Yeah this show really sucks you in because in almost all the shows, almost all of them mess up the first time, after the initial visit. Dr. Now yells at them and then they get their shit together. Dr. Now yelled at them when they arrived in Houston because for the 4 months he was counseling him long distance he lost nothing. Then he spends 10,000 dollars of his father's money to go there and GAINS 158 pounds. He gets reamed out AGAIN and 2 months later comes back having GAINED again 3 pounds.  Here is an immobile guy who continues to stuff  his face. His enabler should have had the understanding of the gravity of the situation and not brought him the food- it's not so hard to believe that he would have trouble sticking to the diet and it would be very difficult for him. But the fact that she kept on bringing him shit food is indeed mind-boggling. Any functioning adult would say to him: James, we spent $10,000 that was a gift from your father to get you here, you just went into heart failure, I have to keep cleaning up your shit and piss, NO I am not bringing you Chinese food, have a plate of fish. 

Any RATIONAL human being gets it. Why why why could she not say no to him and put her foot down? There were SOOOOO many reasons! Yes, he is an addict, but she is bringing the addict his booze and then complaining that she has to deal with the consequences of it. 

When James dies, The state of KY needs to charge Lisa with 2nd degree murder. Also fine her for all the resources drained while she was being complicit in his impending demise. 

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23 hours ago, Ocean Chick said:

Which is fine, if that works for you.  But why would Lisa and Bayley need step by step instructions on how to prepare food that they prepare Every.  Single.  Day?  They would know by now that he requires 6 eggs and 6 sausages and 6 biscuits, crumbled.  With LOTS of gravy over everything.

Exposition for the viewing audience, I think, to be sure we really understood all the details of this so-called meal. 

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