JudyObscure

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  1. Yes, and then Bonnie and Bill's thrilling forbidden romance would have fizzled within a year.
  2. Okay then, the only stripper I know was fired for weight gain, but she's just one person. Mainly, I just wanted to say la gorda, my new Spanish word. I myself would love to be la gorda again, since I have moved on to la gargantua. No, but she is the one sleeping with your husband and driving your Range Rover. I think in Frances's mind Bill was cheating on her and Bonnie was stealing from her.
  3. That's right, Bonnie doesn't like the term "mistress," because it makes her sound like a side piece, and she's not a side piece. I haven't led a particularly sheltered life but I think this woman was cruder than anyone I've ever met. It was obvious she had memorized a line to say whenever her stripper past comes up, something like "I-was-a-stripper-it-was-a-mistake-I'm-so-ashamed." Yeah, Bonnie, we know you quit stripping after you got too gorda. You know, I'll bet Frances would probably have continued to play her passive role of the ill-treated, tragic wife if two things hadn't happened. (1) Bill laughed at her anger instead of his usual crying and apologizing, and (2) Bonnie got to drive the new Range Rover.
  4. As much as I despised Bonnie, Frances's behavior was just horrible. Her excuse of "I wanted to talk to her," made me want to shake her. She could have gone to Bonnie's house anytime for a "talk." Frances was in full on road rage, going 95 on a two lane road, calling her daughter at the same time, and side swiping her husband. Didn't want to get a divorce for the family? Those kids were being drawn into the middle of it all so that Frances could complain and cry to them about their father. That said, Bonnie was such a sleazy, lying piece of work. When she stared telling Andrea about her implants and all the details about how, "I wasn't very big, just a little more than a "B" cup," I thought Andrea was going to put her hands over her ears and say TMI! How can you decide that someone is your soulmate, the love of your life, your romantic destiny -- when he's married to someone else and clearly not going to get a divorce? Explain how that works, La Gorda? I think, to some extent, Bill, Frances and Bonnie all three loved the drama until it all ran off the road on them.
  5. I always wonder why they think children want those sort of loud, frantic shows. What bothers me most are the busy, cluttered sets. Poor kids, everything in their world is some kind of sensory overload.
  6. You're right, Orza. I'm with SusanSunflower, in spirit, believing, at some level, that anything on PBS will be of higher quality than network TV, Sunday night will be even better, and anything under the "Masterpiece," flag will be extremely highbrow, preferably a fine adaptation of a classic, by George Elliot. Hah! Why do I keep believing when I should have learned from Bennie Hill and Mrs. Bucket that PBS will purchase any silly thing so long as they have British accents.
  7. Right. That's why I said: The first part of my post, as I already explained a few times, was talking directly to someone who I thought had chosen to have a baby with no man in the picture at all. She has since corrected me. I misunderstood her. Okay? All I know is, the general statistics say, over and over, that children of divorce are usually not as happy as those who stay married. That's information that wasn't out there when I decided to leave my husband. I really, really wish I had been warned because the divorce ruined my son's life. Yes, as you say, there are kids out there with divorced parents who do just fine, and that's what I told myself when I made my decision, but the odds were against me and I lost. You can leave the biggest jerk in the world for the nicest guy in the world, but if your kids aren't happy, chances are, you won't be happy. At least that has been my experience. I know there are other, more positive stories. In the 1970's those stories of women "finding themselves" and the children being happier because the mother was happier was all we read in the books or saw in the movies. Then, in 1981 Newsweek published the first big report on children of divorce and it was not good, particularly for boys. It was information I would give anything to have had one year before. People are going to do what they want to do. I just think an informed decision is usually better than an uninformed one.
  8. Right, there are lots of options and the option to have children without getting married first is already the most popular option in many circles. It was when you said you didn't want to get married and then asked what the divorce rate was, that I thought worry about it ending in divorce, not actually the marriage itself, was what made you decide not to get married. If you simply don't want to get married then the divorce rate doesn't even matter, does it? By all means, do whatever makes you happy. I don't have a daughter and only one son, so I tend to identify with other mothers of sons (Peter's mother, Bryan's mother) and think about the way some of my friends have lost all contact with their grandchildren after the baby's mama decided to move away. I would wish for my son to have the legal rights that go along with marriage. It's just a different viewpoint.
  9. Well yes, sorry, I was because I was thinking of you and what you said upthread about considering having a child all on your own. You're right, co-parenting is another option, but while you're worried about marriage because of the high rate of divorce, keep in mind that unmarried "co-parenting" couples are five times more likely than the married couple to split up. Of course all sorts of arrangements exist and some work out wonderfully well, but we're talking about the statistics that indicate what gives the baby the best chance. You can find people whose single mothers got pregnant at fifteen and the child was brought up in poverty, but is now a happy successful adult, but I wouldn't recommend that because much more often, it doesn't turn out as well.
  10. This doesn't exactly make it seem like the divorce rate is zero, LOL. So, if a woman is married when the child is born it has about a 52% chance of living in a two parent home until it's grown. If the mother doesn't get married at all, it has a 0% chance of living in a two parent home, at all, ever. I don't see the advantage. Yes, divorce is hard on a child, but I would think never having a father at all would be even harder.
  11. Me too. I particularly didn't like realizing that the writer used that tired and cruel old cliche of, "He's married, but his wife is mentally ill." Jullian Fellowes just used that on "Downton Abbey," and I didn't like it then either. What about, "In sickness and in health?" It encourages us to picture every mentally ill person as Mr. Rochester's wife, screaming in the attic, attacking him with knives and flames every chance she gets. Maybe Mrs. Dreyfuss has seasonal depression, anorexia, or OCD? Even schizophrenia is perfectly possible to live with when well medicated. Anyway, I can't imagine his wife ever being more frightening than Rose when she's soaking wet with her mouth wide open and her eyes bugged out. I understand all the comparisons with Emma Thompson she does look and sound like her, but Emma is a wonderful dramatic actress, while to me Hattie Morahan belongs on a vaudeville stage. Yes you, Hattie. https://i.guim.co.uk/img/static/sys-images/Observer/Columnist/Columnists/2015/1/23/1422033167616/hattie-morahan-the-change-012.jpg?w=300&q=55&auto=format&usm=12&fit=max&s=d7b75ca22c7664707cdb5c51ed844085
  12. I don't understand Peter's mother at all. If my son had my grandchildren without benefit of marriage I would be very worried for them and myself. Couples who live together verses get married are five times more likely to split up than the married couples. Then, or when, the mother decides to take the kids and go across the country with another man, the father has even less chance of getting custody or regular visitation than the divorced father, and that's already heavily skewed in favor of the woman. That man she goes off with? Way more likely to abuse the children than the bio dad. The kids growing up with the single mother will then be far more likely to live in poverty, drop out of school, have teen pregnancies, make lower grades, end up in prison ... the list goes on and on. I'm not judging, all sorts of stuff happens that we can't for see, I was a single (divorced) mother myself, but why deliberately start out with the odds against you and your child? Even if Peter and Rachel got divorced a few months after the baby was born, he would have at least had a chance to bond with the baby. Just imagining the cuteness of Peter/Rachel babies has made me all broody.
  13. Yes. "character," in the phrase, "acting out of character" is referring to a person's usual behavior, not to his role in a play. Although a character in a play can act out of character, too. If someone usually drinks in moderation and then has too much at the party, we can say he's acting out of character. It doesn't have to mean, "Aha! Now we see your true colors and we were wrong about you before. You're bad!" It could just mean he's going through a bad patch. That may be what's going on with Geordie, or else his job with the darker side of life has permanently changed him for the worse. Like Auntie Pam I'm still enjoying the show and liking the characters, even though they're making bad decisions and messing up their lives. I'd like to shake some of them but I don't hate them. I loved "Last Tango in Halifax," and many of them were creatures of impulse, too. Yes, I know. My first husband tried to get out marriage annulled, after we were legally divorced, so he could marry a Catholic woman in the church. I wanted to help them out so I filled out all the paperwork trying to make myself look like a real dunderhead who barely understood the vows we took when we eloped at 19. It didn't get the official okey dokey, but I know people with even less reason who did manage to get annulments from RC church. I guess it's one reason I bristle a little bit when people imply that we protestants are just a bunch of shakey Christians who's only reason for choosing their church is, "so they can get divorced." Catholics dissolve a lot of marriages, too, they just call it a different name.
  14. Sorry, I didn't mean to be inaccurate, I just didn't want to write a book so I didn't go into the dispensation. Of course Henry would have had, to have had some sort of special permission to marry his brother's widow in the first place and so the Pope had given it based on his brother's health being so poor everyone thought his marriage had not been consummated. Henry later thought the marriage actually had been consummated -- whether that mattered to anyone but Henry, I don't know.
  15. Henry VIII wasn't after divorce, he was after annulment of his first marriage which he believed was against the teachings of the Catholic church. She had been married to his brother and it was against the Catholic rules then to marry your bother's widow. Henry thought his lack of a male heir was do the fact that he was" living in sin" with a woman he wasn't legally supposed to have married. The Pope refused to grant the annulment, for political reasons, and that, along with other issues like corruption in the RC leadership, was why Henry wanted to separate from the church. Sidney couldn't remain a vicar and marry a divorced woman in the 1950's.